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Let me raise my own kids the way I want to!

UGH! I'm so freaking tired of my kids grandparents telling me how the "proper" way to raise kids! They sure didn't do a freaking good job! Today at my dads house my mother was arguing with me on why I don't give my kids certain things. She wants me to butter a roll and give it to my 1 yr old and I said no he doesn't need butter if he likes rolls plain. Then she goes on to tell me what a bitch I am. I told her we have obesity on both sides of the family and my children don't need unnecessary fat. She goes off to tell my dad a called him fat, which I never said that. Then she's upset I won't give my 2 and 1 yr old diluted caffeinated soda. I tell her, they don't need soda. She tries to give them both candy every time I visit. I don't mind candy every once in a while but she gives them as much as a teenager would eat. Today she called me a fat bitch and a selfish mother. (I'm 5'3 and 140lbs) !. I'm in my weight limit but CONT>

 
mommy_of_two388

Asked by mommy_of_two388 at 10:47 PM on Aug. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Level 43 (154,356 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • You are being abused by your mother, but the good news is your an adult and don't have to ever see her again if you don't want to. I'm sorry she treats you so horribly:(
    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 10:50 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • I'd have them come over to visit, if they love your children they will come to your house, then it's all your rules.
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 10:55 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • CONT>>
    But I am the heaviest I’ve been ever without being pregnant. I use to be 118. The depo caused my weight gain and I do eat healthy and exercise but it won’t go away. Hell she’s 5’2 and weighs more then I do. I told he I was done visiting over there and I won’t return if I’m going to be treated that way and her not listen to me on what I do with my kids and what they eat. I said she had her turn and now it’s mine. My mother was a horrible mother! She was never meant to be a parent. She shipped us off to my grandmas and went off drinking. She was never there for us kids growing up and she has the nerve to sit there and tell me how to raise my kids “properly“. How would you deal with this?
    mommy_of_two388

    Comment by mommy_of_two388 (original poster) at 10:47 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • that always happend ur parents will always try to be involved in the way you raise your kids..u should just ignore them
    and try not to pick up fights the least thing u want if for your kids not to see their grandparents.
    i was the same when i had my DD at young age and iu hated it but just smile and say okay :)
    Leilene07

    Answer by Leilene07 at 10:53 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • I agree with Leilene she has no right to question your parenting
    DeeMarie87

    Answer by DeeMarie87 at 10:57 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Wow do we have the same mom? I had to cut my mom off because she wanted to make my kids do something she wanted them to do and she was always telling me what a shitty parent I was I would just let her go and move on if she is going to be this way to you, you should walk away. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:57 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Sorry Leilene I'm not going to smile and say "okay" when she's giving my 2 and 1 year old coke/pepsi in cups and handfuls of candy
    mommy_of_two388

    Comment by mommy_of_two388 (original poster) at 10:58 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • It is really hard when it comes to grandparents.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 10:58 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Well I am sorry that this is how the relationship is between you and your mom. I understand your frustrations a little. I kind of deal with the same things. Of course I have a good relationship iwth my mom and MIL, so it is definitely NOT on the same level as yours.

    Our parents were just raised differently. I think you need to sit down and talk to your mother about the resentment you have, you owe it to yourself to do that, then once you get all those feelings out, maybe you can begin healing.

    I would just let your mother know who the parent is. And say "if you don't let me raise my kids as I see fit, I will have to limit their time with you. So please respect my decisions as their mother". Or something to that effect. I am kind of tired tonight, but I would try to be as tactful as I could. I don't like getting down on others levels KWIM... so even if she is rude - try to be nice. I know it'll be hard. GL
    ratchetlee

    Answer by ratchetlee at 10:59 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • ratchetlee I've tried to let things go with her but she always pulls the same crap over and over. She leaves her alcoholic drinks laying around in reach of my 2 yr old and just calls it "grandmas juice" my daughter hears juice so she's grabbed it a few times and my mother thinks its funny. I've sat down with her and she says she's the grandparent and she'll do what she wants. I've been away from my family for 3 years and just recently moved back and i come back to the same crap i grew up with.
    mommy_of_two388

    Comment by mommy_of_two388 (original poster) at 11:02 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

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