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How do I help my sister?

My sister just turned 20 yrs and still is young minded. She is now pregnant and don't know who the father is because she has been cheating on her husband. I wasn't very happy with her when she told me the news and she got mad. Well she doesn't work didn't graduate and does drugs on a daily base! She doesn't have a plan and seems not to care about the little life inside her. I don't know how to talk to her so it doesn't seem like I am telling her what to do with her life just because I already have two kids. I just want to help her get on her feet and be ready for the baby when it comes.
WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO HER AND HOW?

Answer Question
 
mommy-in-pink

Asked by mommy-in-pink at 7:09 PM on Jun. 29, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • If she is doing drugs while pregnant I would call the police. I am sure they can take her to a hospital and the hospital would do a de-tox on her. If you do not stop this behavior who will?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:21 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • I am so sorry for you that you have to go thru this. But, for your sister, you need to give her some tough love. Tell her to knock it off, and you will try to give her all the guidance that you can. If she doesn't then you need to tell her that you are calling the authorities. And if she doesn't stop at all, that her baby is going to be killed, and she will have to live with that on her concious, or that she is going to have a baby that may be born special needs, and that will make her life super hard.
    Laura1012

    Answer by Laura1012 at 7:26 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • You can't make someone care who doesn't want to care. You can encourage her to stop taking drugs immediately. You can suggest she take some parenting classes and make sure she gets good prenatal care. If possible, attend with her and make it a family thing. Some women just don't get the mother thing. They are simply incubators for babies. I'm not saying that is your sister but you can't force her to care. Just love her and try to make suggestions as best you can to help her plan for whst is coming. Some young women think being a mom is a natural thing and no planning is needed. They don't realize how much is involved and the high cost of parenting nowadays. Maybe she will put the baby up for adoption for a family who truly wants to give a baby a loving home.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:56 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • Tell her they give drug test at the dr. and mabey that will scare her, or call a counselor and see what your options are.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:06 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • First of all, little sis has made her decisions in life. She could careless about that child inside her and it's about time that someone steps in and takes control of the situation...

    First, let your sister know what you are planning to do If she does not go and seek help for her addiction. Tell her you are giving her 24 hours that is and thats all. If she responds positively, fine..if not, call the proper authoritites and let them know what's going on and then tell her dh as well.
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 9:34 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • Call the Steve Wilkos show...Seriously
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 AM on Jun. 30, 2008

  • there is nothing u can do cause she refuses to listen, and she is still doing drugs, and u cant really reason with someone on drugs, and she obviously doesnt care about the baby, cause she would have stopped. call her dr, let her dr know that she is doing drugs, call the police cause she is endangering her childs life over it.
    kissmiss213

    Answer by kissmiss213 at 2:57 AM on Jun. 30, 2008

  • If she is using drugs daily it is hard to get through to her. She needs to be the one to want to change. It is a sad situation. The saddest part is she does not care enough about the life inside her to want to stop. Apparently she does not care about herself. Never give up, try your best and keep reaching out to her. Tell her you love her and that she needs to get help. Sometimes knowing she has love and support may help her to get the help she needs. However, if clearly she is not listening then you need to step in for the sake of that baby. If she is doing drugs while pregnant chances are she will continue once the baby is here. Your sister has a choice in this matter, however that poor innocent baby does not.
    Kellyjude1

    Answer by Kellyjude1 at 8:59 AM on Jun. 30, 2008

  • The problem with people who are doing drugs everyday is that they wont stop until they are ready to stop. You can send them to rehab, you can threaten them and they will say okay and then go off to rehab with their mind set that they will do only what it takes to get out so they can go back to doing drugs. Honestly I would be calling someone who deals with drug addicts on a daily basis and get their opinion. Having her hauled off in a police car is just gonna make her mad. So my advice is get professional advice.
    elovelly

    Answer by elovelly at 9:17 AM on Jun. 30, 2008

  • If she is doing drugs on a daily basis they will certainly find this out when she gives birth and will most certainly have the baby taken away if it lives that long. Talk to her husband if you can, he can have her put into a program.
    momto1727

    Answer by momto1727 at 12:10 PM on Jul. 2, 2008

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