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3 Bumps

What do i do?

I have been talking to this guy on facebook we exchanged number and texted and talked all night he seems so perfect (yeah i know you gotta be carefull with guys out there) the thing is I have this stuff called neurofibromatosis and it affected my bone in my leg i have had lots of operations on it and I walk with a limp he dont know this like what am i suppose to do tell him this before we meet in person or just meet him with out telling him like how would i even start out to tell him this. this has always been a big issue with my i stayed with my ex and this is what always makes me go back to him b/c i am scared to meet new people. My ex always told me I was so lucky to be with him i can't do any better...i don't deserve anyone or anything really put me down alot (i was with him for 7 years he told me this the whole time) He is the only guy i really ever dated....so should i tell this new guy about my leg problem?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:31 AM on Aug. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • Yes, better to find out now that he isn't ok with it rather than later. If he is cool with it, then sounds like he might be a great guy. You let the Ex of your's beat you down, there is nothing wrong with you. There is a world full of men out there that would think you are the best thing ever! Good luck, but be careful:)
    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 9:35 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • I would not be deterred from dating somebody with a limp. You are fine. You have allowed your ex to make you feel like you aren't worthy of finding somebody new. It's not true. Just to ease your mind before you meet him you should mention you had an operation on your leg and you have a bit of a limp. He probably won't even give it a second though and you'll feel more confident when you meet him because he'll already be expecting it.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 9:35 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • he has seen pictures of u ? if he did just tell him if he doesnt like u cause of that then fuck him plenty of guys out there and as for your ex he is weak for saying that shit too u fuck him and dont ever go back to him and your strong for leaving him after all that brain washing shit he was saying to u
    cnoble927

    Answer by cnoble927 at 9:36 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • My neice has that, so I am right there with you hunny. It is VERY hard to explain to people. She was born with brown spots on her body and now at any moment any of them can turn into a tumor. She is only ten and does MRI's every 6 months or more due to them and the fact that they have found a mass on her brain that is inoperable as well as spots have begun to form across her brain. But to meet her you would never know anything was wrong with her! She is a shining light as I am positive you are! :)

    You don't have to break it to him. Since you met on Facebook post a note about your disease and what it means to your life and how it has affected you. Be open and honest with yourself. Then if you want you can tag him and your other friends/family in it. That will allow him an inside look into you rlife and what you are going through and he can make his decision on his own without you ever having to know anything. :)
    Memigen

    Answer by Memigen at 9:37 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • If you walk with a limp, he'll see it if you meet. There's no reason to agonize over this; it's not like people tell someone before a first date that they're overly attached to their mother, have commitment issues, or suffer from chronic constipation.
    SWasson

    Answer by SWasson at 9:37 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • I know that it will not make a bit of difference to him. :)

    Good luck and much happiness to you!

    Feel free to contact me at any time especially since the disease is so rare. :) I would love to speak with you any time. :)
    Memigen

    Answer by Memigen at 9:37 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • I would. It doesn't have to be a deal breaker at all !! A real man loved the woman for who she is. and how kind her heart is.
    And don't ever go back to your ex.....he was putting you down to make himself feel beeter because he knew he was the lucky one to have YOU in his life
    justgrape723

    Answer by justgrape723 at 9:39 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • And hunny the only reason your ex told you that was because he was too immature to tell you he was insecure and knew/knows he isn't shit to have. He just wants to make someone THINK he is so he can feel superior.
    Memigen

    Answer by Memigen at 9:40 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • To add, I agree with Memigen... The only reason your Ex said those things to you was because he knew he couldn't get anyone as great as you and knew you were self conscience about your leg and used it against you to keep you with him. In my book, that is one big flaming cowardly A$$hole! Stay far away from that loser:)

    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 9:44 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

  • First of all, realize you are so fortunate to be away from your ex. You need to tell yourself, and believe it, that you are deserving of so much more. I am so glad you were able to call it quits.

    You need to know someone a long time before you can say he is right for you. I think you know that, but you have already said the guy on FB "seems so perfect". I am very concerned that you not meet up with him in other than a public place for awhile and get a background check, etc.

    OK, so about your leg. I don't feel it is necessary to mention it as people should be accepting of such things, BUT I personally would probably mention it because I have enough insecurities that I would want to know up front if this was going to be an issue. It tells how vain someone can be. I would have to have that cleared right away, that's just me. Now, if he says no problem it doesn't mean he is fabulous! Be careful! GL

    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 9:44 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

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