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please not wanting a fight i just want to know why

why is it that moms on here will talk to a 13 14 or even 15 year old that joins and says oh im pregnant and then tell that kid that its ok that they did nothing wrong ? i had one at 17 and ya i screwed up but noone told me it was no big deal whe i tell them that they need to be smart and do what is right for them and that baby by maybe adoption people yell at me how is telling a 13 year old that it is ok to have a baby ?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on Oct. 6, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (15)
  • its not that its okay for them to have a baby so young but if they wanna give being a parent a try let them. they opened there legs they have to deal with it. just because your young doesnt mean you wont be a good parent. its harder yes because theres more things to juggle like school and maybe a new job for extra support but that doesnt mean they cant do it. im 16 and yes i dropped out but i also have my ged already and i start collage the semester after i turn 17. its not okay that i got pregnant but im a damn good mom for my little girl no matter when i had her or how old i was im not any different form a 30 year old mom who had to move back home because she was strugging by herself with a newborn. im just 14 years younger.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Because it isn't your choice to tell them if they were wrong or not! The fact is that they are pregnant and they have to deal with that. Telling them they were wrong isn't going to help anyone. I am sorry for your children if you really feel that you screwed up when you had them... One of my good friends had her first at 14... She now has 7 and a grandbaby... She is a great mom and always was... Her age was not an issue when she had her baby and she never thought of it as a mistake... She loves her kids and they know it... I think it is a great thing that these girls want the support so that they can care for their babies... I don't think they have made a mistake and even if I did I don't think it's my place to tell them that. If you are that hateful just don't talk to them.

    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 12:18 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • i get that but i mean some of these girl are trying and people want to tell them oh its ok and baby them they need to be slapped with reality .. i am a very good mom to my son and i finshed school and am in college and im 22 now expecting another and even now still i am worried and struggling i just dont see how these girl ar like ok well my mom will take care of me if i had a girl and she thought that way she would have anotherthing coming
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • if its not our place to tell them they are wrong then what makes it your place to tell them there parents should be fine with it ?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • I understand what your saying but I am not there and I can't tell them what to do. What I can do is speak from experience ( I was 18 when my oldest was born) and hopefully give them some advise.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 12:52 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • well any 13, 14, or 15 yr olds arent suppose to be on here anyway. I dont tell them anything. I report their profiles & get them deleted. They are children. They should be dealing with their parents not coming here and pretending its ok to play mommy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:04 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • They aren't supposed to be on here? Where does it state that? This site is for mothers, no matter what age they are. It is not our place to treat them like children. They are coming to this site to get advice on how to handle their situations and to get tips on parenting. What are we supposed to do? Bar them from being here and leave them to fend for themselves? Maybe you should be deleted from the site.
    jvfierro

    Answer by jvfierro at 5:55 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • i hate to say it but that is a real mean thing to do have them deleted wat if thay dont have the parents whom care about them at all and weither tehy should be told thay were wrong er not its not ur place ill lett you in on a few of ma friends on dis web page they are both 15 and prego and are scared shit less mia her mom is dead and has no idea wat to do and tracey her parents are junkies and have kick her out thay come on here for advice not to be judge and ever thing happens for a reason so just let em alone if u dont wanna help wat good is it going to do to tell em they were wrong is that going to make em stop being prego no if any thing it makes young mom so upset they kill the baby by usein a lot of drugs or hitting there stomch till the misscarige or they give birth and just leave the baby some were so think about wat ur imput and actions is really going to do
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:57 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • and this web page is for moms there is no age if u have/hada baby ur a mom
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:58 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • why would you want them deleted? there are groups for moms over 18 but CM as a whole is for MOMS. if they have a child they're raising, they should have somewhere to come for help. yes, they screwed up & they have a huge responsiblity now, but shouldn't we encourage them so that they can be the best mom they can be? so often discouraged, overwhelmed parents become abusive.

    no one has the right to tear down anyone else, lift them up or keep your mouth shut. don't crush their spirits.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:33 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

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