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would you be friends with an ex that was years before your husband if husband didn't care

My husband and I have an awesome relationship, seriously there is no jealousy between us. We actually have hung out with one of his ex's when we were in New Mexico visiting his family at one point. We are like best friends and we get along great. Well last night one of my ex's got in touch with me through facebook. This is the ex that should have never became a bf in the first place. At the time I dated him we were good friends and I had just left my husband who was very abusive and had become a single mother and was having a horrible time. This guy was there and pretty much one thing led to another, we only stayed together 2 weeks. My husband came around a year later and since then he adopted my oldest, we have a 2 yr old and a baby girl due in November, things are great. This guy wants to be friends again with me and my hubby, hubby is cool with it, we talked to him for like an hour and things went great.

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mommatink83

Asked by mommatink83 at 2:51 PM on Aug. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (102 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I don't see why not if everything is as platonic as it sounds. I am still friends with some of my ex's and my DH is still friends with some of his. I think it says a lot if you can remain friends with someone after a breakup.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 2:53 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • I have a few ex's on my Facebook, my DH does not care for Facebook so he doesn't really know who's on my friends list..but if he did know who was who then he would care. Actually come to think of it his ex gf is on my friends list, lol
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 2:59 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • I think it's great that your hubby is ok with it, it's great that there is no mistrust or jealousy in your relationship; I am sure it makes things a little easier. If your hubby is ok with you reconnecting as friends with this individual then it's okay. Me personally, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't be ok with him being friends with his ex, at the moment he does speak to his ex because they have a child in common and I've been ok with that since I've known him, they have the child in common and I understand they have to co parent.

    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 3:03 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • I think as long as he is ok with it, I guess it would be ok. I doubt it would ever happen here though.
    KamiB79

    Answer by KamiB79 at 3:19 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • Sure.If your exes weren't abusive.I'm friends with all my exes.& I also have men friends.I don't know what I'd do if my SO was a jealous man.
    bvannkissy

    Answer by bvannkissy at 4:32 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • no to me that always brings trouble.
    koensmom22

    Answer by koensmom22 at 4:59 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • I'm friends with most of my exs. In fact I just went on a camping weekend with one and his wife. (It wasn't just the 3 of us...there were 5 couples all together!) It's possible to be friends as long as there are NO feelings towards that other person...as in sexual, emotional feelings. Make sure you keep everything out in the open with your husband and why wouldn'd it be fine?
    michelle121003

    Answer by michelle121003 at 6:55 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • Um NO. Exes are exes for a reason, and they should stay in the past. I wouldn't be OK with him being friends with his exes.
    MommaofH2

    Answer by MommaofH2 at 10:48 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • well why not? it's not like you guys have years of history together as a couple... if you want him as your friend and you are able to talk to your hubby about it and he is fine with it, then why not?
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:58 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

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