Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how to do this?

my babys father n I broke up about 5 months ago. We r supposed to b tryin to work on things but he is goin out with his friends all the time wether its to the lake or mud boggs he is always with them and I dont feel that he wants to make things work. He is tellin me all kinds of things like Im immature n this n that but yet he was ready in december to get married to me. He made me feel like I'm not good enough for neone. Everyone is tellin me to move on but its not that easy. what do I do? N how do I do it? I love him so much but hurt so much to

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:16 PM on Aug. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I would honestly move on. You have to cut your losses and forget about this person and focus your attention on making you happy and raising a happy well adjusted child.

    Answer by coala at 10:18 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • If you haven't already, get job training and a job and find out about child support. Instead of focusing on the man, focus on yourself and your child so that you can make a good life for the two of you. This way you won't need to hurt and wonder about the man.

    Answer by Bmat at 10:19 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • actions speak louder than words. tell him you dont like the way he is acting or talking to you.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 10:19 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • just try and do things to keep your mind off of him. join a gym that a nice daycare, get a babysitter and go out with your friends, go back to school, work - etc. - keep your mind off of him the best you can and whats ment to be will be. i know how you feel though. GL

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 10:19 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • It sounds like he doesnt want to be with you, but he doesnt want you with anyone else either. You need to just move on as difficult as it is and know that in the end it will be better for your child

    Answer by Decker at 10:20 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • leave him girl

    Answer by regian19832002 at 10:25 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • It's hard to just move on...I was in your shoes recently. I had to keep myself busy and sometimes go in the bathroom to just cry because I felt so alone. When everyone said just move on, just let go it made me want to grasp for more. I didn't want to let go, but the fact of the matter was HE did. He let go of me and that's what it sounds like this guy has done to you. Look at what you wrote...he's out having fun and you're at home being miserable without him. He's moved on honey and you need to too. You have to make up your mind that you've had enough of his crap and you're taking back control of how you feel. Right now he's in charge. Do you want him to make you feel like this? It's out of your hands now, sister, just let it ride. You can do better than some guy who calls you immature. You're in a sucky place but you can pull yourself out of it! Be strong!!

    Answer by michelle121003 at 10:34 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • who broke up with whom? this is confusing... he was ready to marry you but now you're broken up? in any case... he obviously is not interested in trying to make things work. he has moved on. you have to deal with what is happening rather than what was said. you are the only one in control of your feelings. he doesn't make you feel anything... it is all about what you choose to internalize. try making a decision about yourself based on who you are. if you have forgotten who that is aside from his partner, now is a good time to get back on track with that.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:08 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • Come straight out and ask him what's more important to him, his friends or his family? One or two nights out a week tops with his friends, but he needs to be spending more time at home. Make sure you tell him there is nothing wrong with going out with his friends as long as he doesn't do it every night. That way you are making a mature decision and not coming out to tell him to give his friends up completely.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:17 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.