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3 Bumps

what to do

Quickly, my dh and his ex are in a custody battle. So there is a lot of comnunications with our lawyer. The latest thing is bm claiming that I told my sd to cut her own hair. Which never happened. My sd does want a haircut and her mom won't take her. We are not allowed to without permission. So sd.who is 7 cut it herself at bms house. When asked why she told her mom I told her to. Now sd .did admit to lying to her mom to myself and dh because she didn't want to get in trouble. Bm however wants to use this in.court against us. What should we do with sd? Should she be punished so I don't get blamed for further things? Should it just be a talk with her? Do we make her tel bm the truth, though I don't know if she will believe. I am at a loss at how to handle this. Any advice would be appreciated.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:35 PM on Aug. 11, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (5)
  • I would sit down and talk to her honestly and tell her that you understand that she was scared to tell her Mom the truth but that lying is never okay. I would go ahead and take this one, since I doubt BM is going to believe her, she is just going to think you and DH bullied her into saying that.

    Try talking to her and making sure she understands that you love her and that you want to help her, but for that to work you have to be able to believe her when she tells you something, and that since she has already been caught lying it is going to make it hard for people to believe she is telling the truth and that while she is right and she might get in trouble it won't be as bad as it will be when you find out she hid the truth
    Maureen-MD

    Answer by Maureen-MD at 11:42 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • I agree completely with the above answer.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 11:56 PM on Aug. 11, 2010

  • What Maureen_MD said. However, the mom may just be one of those BM's that will do everything in her power to "win" at all costs. Hope you all come to a amicable understanding soon.
    adoredby3

    Answer by adoredby3 at 12:36 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I agree with adoreby3
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 3:45 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I would stay out of it. This little girl is very confused, and she was only trying to protect herself in a situation where she has absolutely no control. You can tell the lawyer the truth about the haircut. Then let him handle it.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:06 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

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