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I left my husband because he said he was in love with someone else. we are now 6hours away from each other and i have our kids with me. He said that he still loves me and wants nothing to do with her. he is getting counseling and help for him self because he doesnt know what he wants right now. we will be away from each other for a year should i take him back if he does change in the year and if he is not talking to that woman any more?

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mrs.stephanie

Asked by mrs.stephanie at 3:55 PM on Oct. 6, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (9)
  • Didn't we already answer this question?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Take your time...you need time to heal from all that has transpired in your marriage. If he's truely serious about wanting to be with you, then he'll do what he needs to do but in the meantime, do what you need to do and take care of yourself and your children.
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 4:00 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • That is only something you can decide. I personally would not in fear of it happening again. I would never be able to fully trust him again.
    LovinEveryDay

    Answer by LovinEveryDay at 4:03 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • I think a year is a reasonable amount of time to wait to see if he really is serious about your marriage. I would probably give him another chance if he maintains his present determination to clean up his act.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:04 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • You have to what is best for you. I wouldn't take him back but look at relationships that have lasted for years. I am sure that they went through a lot and kept it together.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Just let me say this to give you something to consider before you make the wrong choice...

    At first he tells you that he's in love with another woman, you leave and now he wants to get back together...sounds a little fishy to me. Sounds as if he found out that this other woman wasn't what she was cracked up to be and instead of being a man in the first place, he played the both of you...but its your decision and if he's getting help with his issues, give him that time to get it together but on that same hand you need time to be sure that his decisions didn't damage you.
    treasured_hope

    Answer by treasured_hope at 4:19 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • make him win you back. Don't just go back. Let him prove himself. Start all over and fall in love again.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:33 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Sounds like he's stringing you along in case he can't find another woman who'll put up with his garbage. Like I have replied in many similar posts--any time a man has sex with a strange woman whose sexual history is a mystery, he exposes himself to the AIDS virus. If he comes back to you and has sex with you, he exposes YOU to the AIDS virus. Do you want to take that risk?
    Aprilmorgans

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 4:37 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • I agree with starting over! A year really is along time and people change. You probably have changed some also. I would for sure start by dateing again, and see what happens. I think people change but you have been hurt, so you need to go slowy. A key point to this is his reaction, if you tell him you want to move slow and he agrees or accepts that then it may beworth a shot, but if he insists on moving back in, and acting married right away something is wrong! YOU CALL THE SHOTS!!!
    Med109

    Answer by Med109 at 1:20 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

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