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So how deal with SO unwilling to speak to me at all...

He wants me to start paying bills now so he can save and leave? I'm looking to ways of how to handle this he suggest to even dip into my retirement savings plan....Do you think this is a good idea, wouldn't I be penalized for dipping into my retirement savings plan?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:02 AM on Aug. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • So he wants you to pay everything and he pays nothing? That wouldn't fdly with me me al.

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 11:11 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • No, it's not a good idea to be paying bills out of a retirement savings plan - unless you happen to be retired.

    If you're paying everything, he needs to leave now. No "you pay so I can save".

    Answer by justnancyb at 11:15 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • Do not, do not, do not dip into your retirement plan. You will be penelized and you only have like 30 days to pay it back on most plans. It is a horrible idea. Plus, you need to keep that money for when you retire. It is a horrible idea to dip into it.

    If your DH wants to leave, then tell him to get out. Don't let him bully you into doing something crazy so that he can leave. I agree with "If you're paying everything, he needs to leave now. No "you pay so I can save"." .. That wouldn't happen at all in my house. If he wanted out, then he would get out. I would NEVER pay the way for him and I if he's just saving money to leave. No way.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:45 AM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • If he wants to leave tell him don't let the door hit you in the ass. How you pay bills when this happens - save for his responsibility to pay child support if applicable - is YOUR business and you can figure it out then. Tell him to get the hell out and go sleep on someone else's couch and save there. You are suffering enough, I'm sure. FUCK THAT!!!

    Answer by figaro8895 at 12:04 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • Are you married to him?

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:07 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • What he wants is really irrelevant. What do you want? What are your legal obligations?

    If you are renting and both names are on the lease, I'd try to get removed from it and go on my own. Or if you want to stay, have him removed from it.

    I'd promptly cancel any joint services/bills/credit cards.


    Answer by BuddyRoo at 1:06 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

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