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Is my oldest daughter gonna feel out of place?

I have a 7 year old daughter and i'm due any day for my other daughter. Everyone keeps telling me to get prepared because My oldest is gonna feel out of place and become very jealous of her little sister.I can see what they're saying cause babies need a lot of attention but I would never just put Mackenzie on the back burner for Anything! Does anyone know what I can do in case she does start to feel left out...I hope it's not the case but to be safe.

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chelebele05

Asked by chelebele05 at 12:04 PM on Aug. 12, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (14 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I don't think so. I was eight when my little brother came along and I just loved tending to him. If she likes to play w/ baby dolls and acts motherly to them then I think she will be just fine. I loved my baby brother and loved to act motherly to him. Now when he got older we did fuss but we get along wonderfully now!
    C_Kight

    Answer by C_Kight at 12:06 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • She deffinetely will. She has been your little girl for 7yrs and now she is going to have to share you with someone else, even if you pay her lots of attention. Just give her extra attention and let her 'help' with the baby. By no means should you make her 'help' but if she asks to help then let her. There will still be jealousy but this will make it a little easier
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 12:06 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I don't think so. I am sure you have included her in your pregnancy all along and at 7 she is old enough to be a big help.

    My dd was born 3wks before my son turned 7. The hardest part for him was Mommy having to stay at the hospital for 2 days. While starting over was hard, I would not change it for anything. Having my son be able to do so much for himself, was a huge help, and he loved helping to bath and feed his sister.
    Maureen-MD

    Answer by Maureen-MD at 12:09 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • She's very excited for Molly and always tells me that she wants to help change diapers and feed her lol all that fun stuff and I tell her of course she can. I just dont want her feelings to change when she actually gets here (which will be anyyyy day now)
    chelebele05

    Comment by chelebele05 (original poster) at 12:10 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I don't think that will happen. Most little girls that age love babies and I think she is going to want to help. I also think you should let her help you some. That will make her feel a part of the family, which is what I would want. It's a wonderful opportunity for her to learn about sharing the spotlight and still being important.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:11 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • She's been the only child for 7 years! Of couse she' s gonna have some problems! It doesn't matter the age, it's always tough on siblings when a new baby comes to the family. My older kids are only 3 and 2, but I schedule specific times to spend one-on-one with them since they got a baby brother. I take my daughter shopping with me or out to ice cream, or do the same with my son. We'll go to the park for an hour or so or whatever. I agree with the post about letting her help. I do that with mine and it has helped them alot. They help by getting me diapers, my daughter picks out the baby's cloths, etc. Sit her down and talk to her honestly about her feelings of becoming a big sister. Just let her know you won't be replacing her and listen to her fears. Good Luck with everything!!!
    Mommaof32010

    Answer by Mommaof32010 at 12:12 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • Well even though newborns need your help more you won't need to be around your newborn all the time. Remember for the first couple of months all they do is eat,sleep and poop lol. In the mean time I would try to things with your 7 year old so that she doesn't feel left out.
    cynprz

    Answer by cynprz at 12:12 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I think it is important to remind her how special she is. A good idea is when you come home from the hospital with the new baby, bring something special for her. Also try to include her in as much as possible when it comes to caring for the baby (not making her do anything, but if she wants to help). I have also heard that sibling classes are great for kids who will be expecting thier first sister or brother. I think she will be OK, and as long as you spend quality time with her, with out the baby she will be more than accepting of the new arrival.

    How does she feel about you being pregnant right now?
    sheloveearth

    Answer by sheloveearth at 12:14 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I would guess that it will be hard for her. She has been your only for 7 yrs and more importantly you have been hers. You might not intend to put her on the back burner, but it will happen at least here and there. She'll want something while you are in the middle of doing something with the baby and you will have to tell her to wait a moment.

    Get her as involved as you can when she is home with you (assuming she will be at school most days.) Sweetie, can you get me a diaper, the paci, choose what your sister will wear today. Make her proud to be the big, helpful sister.

    Also, try to make a big sister and mommy date once a week if you can. Have dad watch the baby and have some special time together.
    balagan_imma

    Answer by balagan_imma at 12:14 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

  • I tend to agree with the ladies that say no she won't feel out of place. Will she be a little jealous?? Yes probably, you just have to make sure to include her in everything that you do, if you are feeding the baby, take the opportunity to read a book to your oldest, or something else that you guys can do while sitting. Also, make sure to do things just you and your oldest daughter. While baby is napping you guys can do something quiet, like say painting her nails, or letting her do your hair, or something fun and girly.

    She will be just fine, this may be a good time for her and Daddy to bong as well.
    carsonsmommy

    Answer by carsonsmommy at 12:14 PM on Aug. 12, 2010

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