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How do you deal with friends that live outside their means and are always broke?

I have several friends/co-workers that always seem to be broke. However, when they talk of the things they spend their money on I'm blown away. Some of these people are so broke days before payday that they don't have money for gas and groceries. At times I feel guilty that I have a savings account with money in it. I feel like I should help them out but, then again it makes me angry that they are so irresponsible.
Ok....sorry, mostly venting but, if anyone has any tips on what to do when days before payday they are complaining about being broke and I know I have money in the bank I would be happy to hear it.

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Asked by sheilaj817 at 6:32 PM on Oct. 6, 2008 in Money & Work

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Answers (7)
  • I have a friend at work that is like that. Today she said "well we got paid yesterday and I am already negative in my account today" Some people are just like that.....I just snicker along with her...she finds it humorous....I NEVER volunteer to help her outta it...she is an adult....she makes the same as I do.....

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 6:36 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • It's not your problem to worry about! They dig their own hole and must live with it. Dont feel guilty for doing the responsible thing and saving money. If they ask for your advice then kindly give them some. One last thing.....make sure you dont loan them money EVER! you know their money habits and dont need to put yourself in the middle of their issues

    Answer by ReneeLRS at 6:39 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • It's not your problem. Just don't lend any of them money. I have two assistants who live way beyond their means and it's ridiculous. But it's their life. They'll learn their lesson one day and remember me telling them, budget budget budget!!

    Answer by feesharose at 6:53 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Best advice I ever got was an English teacher that told us this :
    From Shakespeare's Hamlet, 1603:

    Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
    For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
    And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 7:47 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • I agree with everyone, it is not for you to worry about. However, if they are talking to you about it and they basically tell you that they are blowing there money ask them why the purchased whatever they did. Everyone won't like it and for those that seem to get an attitude just simply say, you ask me and I gave my opinion. If you don't want my opinion then don't talk to me about it. It is easy. Some people do that and won't stop others might just need it pointed out to them by someone else.

    Answer by tpalmer at 7:56 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • When she complains I just listen. I don't offer my advice, because in the past I tried that -- and it just caused hard feelings. Many people don't really want to hear what they are doing wrong financially, its a very sensitive topic. (I make plenty of mistakes too!) Sometimes it takes some serious tongue biting when they talk about not being able to pay a major bill and then in the same conversation are planning a major vacation. I completely AGREE with don't lend them money. I did this one time, helped her make rent.. a week later I wasn't paid back and she bought $200 bed sheets. When I said something she blew up at ME. I told her I felt like she basically spent my money on her new sheets! I was the bad guy, spoiled and didn't know what it was like to be short on money. I tell you what - I don't have $200 bed sheets. Messy stuff.

    Answer by Serafyna at 9:47 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • Many people live beyond their means - most people today live on credit which simply creates more debt. My advise would be to find some great budgeting articles and email them to your friends in these situation. Look at it this way - if you financially help someone who is irresponsible with their money you are only part of the problem and not part of the solution in the long run. Find financial seminars and invite them to go to or simply give them some tips that you have used to make yourself comfortable financially.

    I have little to no sympathy for those who choose to make poor choices; granted they are their choices to make - I choose to help them by no helping them financially because one day - they will have to learn. Good for you for being financially stable and noticing things that could wreck your financial bubble. Kudo's!


    Answer by tbrooks at 12:23 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

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