Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Does anyone have any advice for a mom with a child who has complete melt downs? I am not talking about tantrums...I mean uncontrollable. He is unreachable at times.

I have read several things and most of it just frustrates me. My kid is very smart, emotionally adjusted, caring towards others, knows how to share, says please and thank you, etc.... so to say that he is just a victim of too much instant gratification and needs to learn patience really irritates me.
I know the definition of low-frustration tolerance... My problem is ..... how can I help him? What do I do to help him learn how to tolerate his frustrations in a better way than completely melting down?
He is a younger sibling. He has one older brother.

Answer Question
 
DrakeandGavyn

Asked by DrakeandGavyn at 8:46 PM on Oct. 6, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • My 6 yr old went thru the EXACT same thing...one of THE best things his teacher ever taught him was 1,2,3...1.)What is the problem 2.)How am I feeling? 3.) How can I solve the problem. This encourages him to talk thru what he is feeling.
    mom2AJandDamien

    Answer by mom2AJandDamien at 8:54 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • I agree with first answer.
    Maddape48854

    Answer by Maddape48854 at 11:57 PM on Oct. 6, 2008

  • PM me. I have two kids like that. I may be able to help some.
    3gifts.from.god

    Answer by 3gifts.from.god at 12:20 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • My daughter went had these same symptoms. I found out that she was EXTREMELY vitamin B deficient. Instead of giving her the the harsh meds I incorporated foods with Vitamin B (especially B12) into every meal. I started seeing a change within a couple of days. - She would have complete break downs - sometimes accompanied with a stomach ache... But she doesn't have that anymore.
    rivmom

    Answer by rivmom at 1:00 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • My 7 year old and now my 6 year old do this. I leave them where they are (if possible) until they are done. I tell them when they are done they can come get me and we will talk. If I can, I send them to their room. When they finish the fit, they always come and say sorry, so we talk about what they could do instead. Such as, talking to me, talking to the other sister, and just not being stubborn. It has helped some, they realize that I won't tolerate it. There are sometimes when you just can't avoid it and those times you just deal, and go on. Calmly, if possible...lol
    RenaeMom3277

    Answer by RenaeMom3277 at 7:59 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • Hmmm....Perhaps your child might not feel that he is getting a lot of attention, since he is the middle child in his family. Have you thought that maybe your child feels like the forgotten one? I would investigate that matter. In addition, you might want to consider visiting this website called Nogginpower2. What I discovered on Nogginpower2 is that they have tons of information to aid you in controlling your child's behavior. They are written in a straightforward, yet in an informative fashion. Some of the manuals you might want to examine on Nogginpower2 include Discipline, Making New Friends, Better Social Skills and Getting a Good Night Sleep. All of these manuals should provide you some guidance on how to properly deal with your child's behavior. I hope this helps. Thank you and good luck.
    paulacolls19715

    Answer by paulacolls19715 at 11:25 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • My 5 yr old has those tantrums. I thought he had ODD-ADHD and got him evaluated, he will get so mad at anything that I did not wanted to leave him at the daycare if I was not there (I worked there). He did not have either. Instead he has sensory issues. He satrted therapy and at school (K) he is fine. He does have a corner (safe corner) that when he is not happy he removes himself from the group and his teacher is OK with it. A thight hug works, even if they are screaming...."i am not spoiling him or accepting his behavior" and talk about the issue too. He had meltdowns just because a child sat by him,,,he said that it hurts, I did not believe it but the therapist told me that it is true, they are so sensitive that they feel that.

    I do not know details, but there are a lot of things that can cause meltdowns...keep track of them and times of the day. Would love to help you.
    mamadetresbbg

    Answer by mamadetresbbg at 1:13 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • We have found in our house it is all related to food. My 5 year old would have amazing tantrums my husband was convinced something was "wrong" with her. I watch everything that goes in her mouth and sure enough, too much sugar.....boom. I am not talking about just candy sugar is in so much stuff, I think there is a lot of other foods that bothered her too.

    Good luck!
    malpait

    Answer by malpait at 6:44 PM on Oct. 10, 2008

  • Wow guys. Thank you so much for the answers. There is some good stuff here. I will look into all of them and see what works AND keep you posted.
    DrakeandGavyn

    Answer by DrakeandGavyn at 12:43 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.