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2 Bumps

why do i stay with someone who is abusive?


Asked by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Aug. 13, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • Your mind is being f'd with. It's not you.
    If you have kids please dont think that staying is for them. If you have a daughter she may find out one day that you stayed and allow the same thing. If you have a son he may do the same thing. If something really bad happened to you what would happen to your kids and their mentality. I am worried because I was abused once and was so afraid to leave. It took other people to force me to leave. When I left I was lonely and wanted to forgive. "I was told love dont hurt" They were right, sweetie. Make a PLAN and make your move.

    Answer by Seterah1010 at 5:39 AM on Aug. 14, 2010

  • for our kids... for now. i don't know why though. my grandmas used to say out of fear. i think maybe so... fear of losing our kids.

    Answer by lauchremi at 8:50 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • I'm not sure the specifics of why you do, if you do... But sometimes it takes hitting a "rock bottom" where the abuse is worse than the alternative of being seperated. Also, a support network that you can rely on more than you rely on the person you love/who is abusing you is essential. Anyway, if you want to talk about what's going on I would love to talk to you. You can totally message me. <3, xoxo

    Answer by preggoandfat at 8:51 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • Too hard to leave and start a new life? Money? Want both parents for your kids? You love him and hope he'll change? Those are reasons that would keep me around for awhile.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 8:53 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • because you are scared to leave you dont want to hurt the kids & cause you love him

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 9:16 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • Been there, it's not love. It's codependence.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:11 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • You should watch that documentary "Every F---ing Day of My Life". It might open your eyes. FYI - you're destroying your children by staying in this situation. If you loved them, you'd leave. Good Luck honey.

    Answer by KellyParadise at 11:35 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • r u scared to leave

    Answer by britme1027 at 8:49 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • I think that lauchremi is on the right path of thinking. I think it is fear and losing the kids, but also I think it is courage of knowing that you are making sure your kids don't get the abuse. My sister-in-law went through that and she was scared, but she turned to me and her family and was able to get out.

    Answer by sthrngrl7707 at 8:53 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

  • because it's scarier to think of leaving and what that would mean; what changes that leaving would bring. In the end, you will be happier when you finally leave though.

    Answer by Arione at 8:53 PM on Aug. 13, 2010

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