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Do you have to check behind DH/SO/BF when he is taking care of your child?

I feel like I can't leave dd alone with him for even a second. I'm wondering if I am being paranoid! I ask him to give her a bath....he takes a dirty wash cloth from the clothes hamper and uses it to bathe her. I ask him to make her a bottle, he uses the same bottle liner and does not even rinse/clean the nipple and ring. I ask him to watch her while I take a shower...I get out to find them outside playing in the 40 degree rain. I ask him to feed her while I run an errand....he gives her a piece of cheese and allows her to eat it off the floor. He even leaves the front and back doors open when he goes to urinate (yes, he likes to pee outside)!!!!!

Am I alone here? Does anyone else have to worry about issues while their SO/DH/BF watches their child?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:21 AM on Oct. 7, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • I think most men are like this..
    Us mom's are a bit more paranoid about germs, safety in general, and common sense..
    Guys seem to think that it's all good.. nothing happened.. we all survived .. yippie.. lets do it again.
    I pray and hope that my sons turn out to be daddy's with a bit more of mom in them!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:36 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Wow mine isn't that bad, but he will leave dirty bottles & diapers on the floor. I work one morning a week at the food bank & it seems like every time I get home she is hungry (because "I tried but she just didn't want to eat") and has dirty clothes on. I refused to go this last week because I told him he couldn't be trusted. I work there to get groceries because we are in too much debt to afford them, so this week we are living on ramen noodles and hot dogs because I wouldn't leave him with the baby. He got the point. I would suggest going to a parenting class together. If he really loves the kids he would do anything that could possibly make him a better parent. If he refuses, put up or get out.

    Answer by indexmom at 1:37 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Yes and I am glad you posted this because I have been worrying about something and I think that's why I can't sleep! While I was working tonight my kids 4yrs and 2yrs got into a box of meal replacement bars and ate tons of them! Probably at least 3 or 4 each and I don't know if that is dangerous or not! I keep going to check on them! Ladies I think it's time for us to give our men a wake up call!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Nope sorry my husband has always been great with the kids. Feeding, changing, playing and nurturing them. Now that they are older they have a very close relationship with him. Although, I made sure that I chose a daddy for my kids, that would be responsable. Why does your husband urinate outside? You have a bathroom right? That's nasty. Sorry he seems immature.

    Answer by CelticFaerie at 2:07 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • CelticF - So are you saying that she is irresponsible for not picking the perfect mate? YEAHHH For you and your perfect children and wonderful husband!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:12 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I think sometimes men need to be taught how to do certain things because some of them really don't know! Women are the natural nurturers. But that doesn't mean that we don't need help once in a while! At least for a shower- dang!!!!

    Answer by happymommy284 at 2:18 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I never have to worry about that but I was concerned about that the first time I had to leae my son with my husband. I actually got lucky with the father of my child. He takes care of our son while I work second shift. My son is properly fed bathed happy and wel tended to not to mention asleep when I get home. Though I have found a slight difference in my carring for my son and my husband doing it I can actually do more then one thing at a time. I can watch my son, cook dinner clean the house and take regular play breaks my husband can do only one thing at a time and that is watch our son the house won't get cleaned and the oly time he might attempt to do anything including taking a shower hmself is if Houston is asleep he won't even put him in his playpen while he takes a shower.

    Answer by Mae264 at 2:35 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Anonymous; Yes I think you teach people how to treat you. If he was a slob, lazy, irresponsable before you had a child with him, What do you think he would do after you had a child? I knew my husband for along time before we had our first child. I saw how he interracted with kid.  He knew how to cook, do laundry and pick up after himself. I cannot believe how many women are posting about similar situations. These guys are doing it on purpose to get out of being a responsable parent. And women are letting them get by with it! Do they not know where the door is?

    I don't mean to be hurtful, Yet, I have learned that you teach people how to treat you.

    Oh and thanks. I know I have the perfect husband and kids. My friends tell me that all the time.  Good luck to you!


    Answer by CelticFaerie at 2:37 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • lol

    Answer by alexis_06 at 2:53 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Do you have to check behind DH/SO/BF when he is taking care of your child?----
    NOPE not at all. He's as good as I am when it comes to the kids. I worked night shifts at a hospital for 4 years. He cooked dinner, bathed the kids, put them to bed, got them to school the next morning AND cleaned the house and washed laundry-YAY for me having a wonderful husband! I don't think I could be married to someone any different. If I had to worry about my kids when they were left with their DAD, I wouldn't want him!!!!

    Celtic, I agree with you :)

    Answer by BrendaMomOf3 at 2:55 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

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