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14 yr old Daughter has a belly piercing ...after getting in trouble for having a tongue ring

I am literally throwing my hands up......any advice would be helpful. My dd has a habit of doing what she wants knowing she will get in trouble. I try on be consistent in showing her consequence for her actions. However, she just takes the risk and does what she wants. I know this age is hard and teenagers tend to test parents limits but I don't know what to do. I don't approve of piercing in any other place than the ears...she has 3...still not enough.....aagh

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Asked by jenlesly at 9:19 AM on Oct. 7, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 6 (110 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • make her take it out along with the tongue ring. tell her she can get ewxtra in her ears and the rest wil wait.

    Answer by Lyndall at 9:23 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • i was teh same age at her age. my parents did everything in there power to try to convince me not to do things or i would be grounded. from what i can remember i did it ne way. it took me a couiple years to realize that i made stupid mistakes and at 22 now i hate that i didnt listen cause now i still have teh holes of peirceing i wish i never did.. so from being a 14 yr old point of view i think you just got to let them go through this and she will regret it. iknow youll hate it but at 14 shell do it anyway.

    Answer by vadasmom at 9:25 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Who is paying for this? Who is the adult? Who is taking her to get these done? I don't want to sound rude, but your daughter is just doing what YOU let her do.. I do have a 15yr old daughter, and believe me I do know how girls are.. They will do what YOU allow them to do.

    Answer by honeys_sugamama at 9:27 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • how would she get the piercing without your consent in the 1st place? would someone do it for her?


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • the belly button ring isnt bad, i had mine done at 13. Loosen up a little and maybe she will start listing.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • My mom actually took me to get my belly done when i was 13 & i still have it. The only time i took it out was when i was pregnant, but i put it back in right after. You think 3 piercings are "bad" i have had 23 :) I would have been your worst night mare. lol Mine are all in appropiate areas i just liked piercings. I am now down to two piercings. I understand that you do not approve of them, so I would talk to her about if sh is under your roof she will respect your rules, and when she turns 18 she can move out and do whatever she would like. I would get her a lunch card and stop giving extra money for a while until she builds your trust back, and pay attention to the friends she is hanging around b/c usually they are just trying to fit in. I hope this stage passes quickly for you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:19 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I would make her take them out if you disapprove. The tongue ring can cause tooth damage if left in for over 3 years--look it up.  Show her the evidence and tell her if that happens to her--you are NOT paying for the dental bills.  And stick to it.  Also, tell her you know the main purpose of the tongue piercing and at her age that is totally innappropraite.


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:34 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I would look in to where she had them done and call the Health Dept and report that they are doing underage piercings without parental consent. It doesn't take long for the holes to close on these piercings so if she takes them out on a Friday, come Monday they she may not be able to get the studs back in. And also tell her you are not paying any medical bills related to these--so she better be saving her money:-)

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:36 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Who is giving your daughter her piercings? When I took my daughter at 15 to get her belly pierced a parent with a ID had to be present.  I even had to sign a consent form.  I would have her remove the piercings.  Or make an agreement with her NO MORE PIERCINGS or she will have to remove everything!!  I did not want my younger daughter to get her belly pierced, I felt that I allowed her sister to do it too young.  Well, my daughter had a friend at school pierce it for her!! DANGEROUS!! I had my daughter remove the belly ring and had a long talk with her.  Fortunately, she never did this again.  Her sister and I had an agreement that she may only get her belly pierced and ears and that's it!! So far that's all the piercings she has.  Well, I think.....Good luck with your daughter and pick your battles wisely!!


    Answer by mommiedear at 10:42 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • thank you for your input....Kids have a way of getting what they want even if you dont give them the money.....she claims her friend did it for her in school. I really dont beleive that. I just dont understand what am i doing wrong I actually grounded for a month for getting that peircing and had a talk with if she continues on making decisions on her own and think that i will accept her piercing after being grounded i will not. I though she got it through her head....i guess not. I just wish I could understand her more. Whenever I turn to her father or my husband they are not much help they take it to extremes....I was hoping to get an opinon from you guys ....thank you

    Answer by jenlesly at 10:42 AM on Oct. 7, 2008

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