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Feel Stuck!

Sorry, Anon because the are personal friends here

I've never been a believer in "the one" , as I think each of us is likely compatible with any number of partners. My DH is nice enough, has done well for our family, is caring and by many standards, "a catch".... But when I look back at my numerous realtionships prior to our marriage, he falls out at about number 5 on my list of preferences by overall comparison.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:34 AM on Aug. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • sounds like you need to stop comparing your husband to other past relationships. you cannot work on what is in the present if you are stuck in the past. marriage is a partnership so obviously he is not the only one failing on his end if you are rating him against past relationships you have had. do you want to stay married? if so then i would say go invest some time in your marriage and forget about the past

    Answer by sati769leigh at 11:43 AM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • No, I dont feel that way in comparasion to my past relationships, but I do often feel that way when I see other people happy with their spouce. I feel my husband, although a good provider for the family, lacks everything in the emotional, compassion side...he didn't show his ugly side until after we were married so it is heartbreaking a lot and i often feel stuck. Dont really want to elaborate more on my relationship for personal reasons, but i hope you figure out what is the right thing for you to do.

    Answer by anikahaynes1 at 11:45 AM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • I believe in "the one" and I knew my first husband wasn't it. After I met my now-DH, I realized how much I had missed out on. Having a solid, loving relationship makes everything else better.

    Answer by Scuba at 11:56 AM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • nope. i feel that there are qualities my ex's have that my husband doesn't, but none of them make me question if they were a better choice because they also had some serious faults that there is no way i could live with. nobody is perfect and if you love someone you take the good with the bad. work through problems and be happy with all the great things. where there is love there is no question and looking back. it's moving forward to make life the best it can be.

    Answer by xtwilightx at 11:56 AM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • Yes, I understand what you are saying. I feel there are many good matches for any one of us. I also feel that we have to look at our glass as half full and not half empty. And know that the grass is not always greener on the other side! You need to assess if you have a good, caring, realtionship and if you can be happy. best wishes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:05 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • so you feel like you settled or what? why are entertaining these thoughts? a waste of time if you ask me. you mentioned some good points about the guy-be happy for what you do have.

    stop running into the past and get present.

    Answer by cattiesmom78 at 4:39 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

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