My ex-stepdaughter, 18, wants to stay the night with me this weekend. Her dad and I split back in May. The woman that I suspected had a hand in our divorce, which was finalized in June, and him instantly started dating. As with any divorce it has been pretty rough and I'm finally in a place where I am getting happy with life and enjoying my time with my kids. I know if she comes over and starts to talk about her dad and his gf its going to put me back in a bad place and tick me off. I don't want to feel like that. Do you think it would be rude for me to ask her that if she does come over I don't want to discuss the divorce, her dad or his girlfriend??
Answer by Blubuni99 at 2:42 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by Nyx7 at 2:41 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by dmdblleb at 2:41 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by pipermomofash at 2:44 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
you may not like my answer but it is the honest truth........
Sounds like something my mom would have done. It is hard to hear... maybe you could simply direct the conversation in another direction. But to restrict what a child talks about makes that child really not want to be around. Dont make her feel like she has to walk on eggshells around you so you wont get your feelings hurt or she simply will start to avoid you.
My mom is a pita when it comes to the whole divorce thing... made my wedding an issue, made my kids events issues, etc. 25+ years later and she still says snide things. No wonder I do things with other members of the family more than her... SHE created that issue.
Answer by sahlady at 2:42 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by fiatpax at 2:42 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by canadianmom1974 at 2:45 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by gertie41 at 2:46 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
I don't think it's rude, you're just trying to protect your feelings and you are being quite honest with the way you feel..you're just not quite ready to talk about him right now, May is not that long ago. I am sorry about your divorce. If she wants to spend time with you, I am assuming you two were close. I would tell her that you understand that her father has moved on and that you are okay with it, but you are still hurt over the events that took place and the ending of your marriage. Ask her if she would mind limiting the topic of conversations about her father while in your house; at least for now and that you're simply not ready to hear about his life. Good luck, hugs.
Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 2:46 PM on Aug. 16, 2010
Answer by Maureen-MD at 2:49 PM on Aug. 16, 2010