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How can you find out how someone died?

I just found out a dear friend passed away. He is newly remarried with a young child (he has a 13yr old too). I cant attend the services, can't find anyone to watch the kids!!! I'd have to drive like 2 hours, since I just moved. Anyway, I guess I dont need to know, I never heard of him being sick. it did say unexpectedlly.. IDK My brother committed suicide years back, I dont think its that at all, but I dont know, how is a way of finding out? I dont want to reach out to his family to ask.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Oct. 7, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Do a search for obituaries where he lives. It was how we found out the details of my husband's friend when he committed suicide. Sorry for your loss.
    Lainee21106

    Answer by Lainee21106 at 3:14 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • You could call the funeral parlor that holding the services.... they are sometimes very helpful.... but be honest with them and tell them that you are not in touch with his family.
    PaceMyself

    Answer by PaceMyself at 3:14 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Go to the website for the local newspaper where he lived and look in the obit section.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:30 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • thanks, what do you mean when you say search obituaries? details such as suicide and anything really arent in those in my area at all. those things are always left out. I didnt know if you meant something else. I hink Im going to call the funeral home. Im just sad, and like I said, i cant go, and he is being creamated after the wake, so I cant visit him ever, which just makes me feel strange somehow. I google this question first but all I saw was a bunch of stupid posts about checking pulse and such. I just pray it wasnt suicide, idk why i even thought it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:33 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I actually had the same thing happen to me. The funeral parlor can't tell you..it's against the law. And most of the time the obituaries don't tell you. I still don't know hhow my friend passed years ago. I hope everything works out for you. deepest sympathies
    brock-lee

    Answer by brock-lee at 3:44 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I had the same thing happen recently. I finally called and asked someone, and it turned out my friend died from a drug overdose, and nobody even knew he was using. Very strange. Anyway, the funeral parlor is not supposed to tell you any details like that. It is confidential. But, hey, you could always give it a shot. People do things they aren't supposed to do all the time. Is there a freind of the family or someone like that you could call?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • birth and death records are public wich means they should be avible on the web or at the town hall of the town he lived in try the web first every state has its own website www.??.gov
    jajamama

    Answer by jajamama at 4:14 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Sorry for your loss, I lost a friend, actually my ex, in Iraq. The news said it was an IED, I know, no help for you. Any way, is this in a small town? Do you have any family or friends that could maybe find out for you.
    Florence_Moss

    Answer by Florence_Moss at 6:20 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

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