Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

cont' does your husband keep score.....

My SO will never see this way he feels I am ungrateful and he feels that I never showed him appreciation. While I will admit that I really did not try and I recognize that but it was because I was busy with so many things like;
My girls and their school
My going to college working full time
My mother who is sick with cancer and lives with me.
He is alway focused on his job and spending money on going out to eat and splurging instead of saving and us getting a better place to live. Although I did not contribute much financially I do think i was juggling a lot.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:42 PM on Aug. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Being busy with life happens.. However. We still need to do our best to show our partners in life appreciation for what they do, who they are, and what they bring to the table.

    Truthfully. Do you want to feel, like to feel, and feel better about yourself/your life/your relationship when your partner shows you how much he appreciates what you do?

    Knowing and admitting to yourself that you really do not try, is half the battle. The next half is actually trying and putting for the effort to show him the appreciation that he needs/wants to be shown. Being busy is part of life, juggling it all is part of life. But, showing your partner how much you appreciate them on a regular basis, is also part of life, part of having a healthy and happy relationship.. Not putting forth that effort causes problems in a relationship and you are presently feeling some of those.

    You want appreciation for all that you juggle. So does he

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:50 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • As far as focusing on his job. If he's the sole financial support of the family, then some focus does go to his job. He has to keep it, he has to work towards raises/promotions,ect.. Being the sole financial support of a family has it's own share of stresses that comes with the package.

    As for going out to eat, spending money..etc.. Possible thought. Just a different perspective. Maybe he does those things because he feels you do juggle a lot, that you guys do have a lot going on, and those things are to relieve stress, to be something to make the day just a little better. Another way of saying "you work hard and you deserve to go out and eat".. Maybe that's his thinking.

    As far as saving for a better place to live. That's a joint effort. If you need/want a better place to live, get a plan of action in order and the two o fyo uwork together to achieve that plan.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:54 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • I actually do realize it now but it's too late. I'm just trying to reflect on things since it's still so fresh but I think we are done there is nothing left to salvage our relationship anymore to much has been said.

    Answer by jenlesly at 6:55 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • its still not an excuse for him to throw things up in your face, he is a jerk period

    Answer by 3xangel at 7:18 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

  • he should be worried about being supportive not who contributes more. a marriage is not a business partnership it's a different kind of partnership with different requirements

    Answer by figaro8895 at 8:41 PM on Aug. 16, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.