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Foster Parenting?

Are their any other Foster Parents who are disappointed with the system? We have had 18 kids in and out of our home in two years. It is heartbreaking to watch them go back to bad situations. It seems like people get investigated for bogus thing and those are taken more seriously than kids who really need to be taken away. It makes me so sad and mad at the same time.


Asked by hsmominky at 1:29 AM on Aug. 18, 2010 in Adoption

Level 23 (16,376 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I completely agree with everything you just said. My Mom was a foster parent and the kids who really needed to be taken away from their parents were at home, and the ones who really should not have been taken away were in foster care. It was really sickening.

    Answer by Glamourina at 1:31 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • We are not foster parents, but I completely agree with you. Working with children, I have had to report things that you would think could take some priority just to see NOTHING get done. Then you see the same system all over another parent on false causes.

    Answer by Jessica157 at 1:34 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I completely agree with you I have fostered THREE times for my niece and they just keep sending her back over and over again just for her to get taken away again it is freaking ridiculous then there are parents who actually change and do what they need to do for their children and they are taken away for good! it really irritates me

    Answer by jgwilliams at 4:12 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I have some friends who are Foster Parents and they are adopting now. These children have really had workers who were advocating for them and made sure they were kept safe. However, a lot of caseworkers are not in it for the right reasons. I am not happy with my caseworker and I have only been happy with a few caseworkers that the children have had. We have had a few good experiences and the children are with other family members now who keep in touch with us. However, our last placement had a worker who pushed and got them back home with their Mom. I have maintained a relationship with BM no matter how hard it has been so that I can check on the kids and the things that happen there turn my stomach. The kids should NOT be there!!!! Why could we have not adopted them and given them a stable and happy home instead of all of the disfunction they go through??

    Comment by hsmominky (original poster) at 1:35 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • yea this is a very well known thing.. i dont understand why????????

    Answer by MoMoFu at 1:35 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • My husband and I just became foster parents due to a family member needing a home for her teenage daughter. I think it's just the same as always. We pay people more money to take care of our car than our children. These caseworkers are overworked and underpaid! They must have a caseload that would choke a horse and expected to be personal with each and every one of them. When will we all finally stand up for these children to get them what they deserve? Needs to be soon. They are our future!

    Answer by heather316 at 1:54 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I was a foster kid for 13 years and yes the system failed alot of times. I was 5 when I was taken away and was put in a foster home where the parents abused us, they would hit us and call us names, and would threaten us, they said we would get it worse if we told. they were bad foster parents but then I had a foster mom who wanted to get guardian ship of me she was a really good foster mom and was genuine really took care of us but this girl took advantage didn't come home for a few days and when my foster mom had to report her the girl turned around and said that my foster mom was a drug addict and that she made her feel unsafe, unfortunately they believe the girl never investigated and took us from that home. I was devestated, it does make me mad when they don't look into these things before taking the kids. There are alot of times when they send them back home just to have the kids come back days to weeks later.

    Answer by babyangelromero at 3:27 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I know a couple who couldn't conceive children, became foster parents because they wanted to adopt, took care of 23 in less than 3 years and finally adopted #22 & #23, a sibling set of girls who had been with them for almost 2 years. That was almost 2 years ago. She became pregnant a year later. They are still fostering. It's their ministry. They help for as long as they are needed and when one leaves, they look to the next one who needs them. There is so much out of our control when we foster. God is above the system & everything will work together for good. We just don't understand it all. It can be discouraging. I know how frustrated you are, OP, but try to trust that the Lord is using you in each & every case. Even when it seems hopeless. We don't know what happens when they leave. Sometimes it works out well. Pray for the children who are there, who have left, and those that are to come. Hang in there! Hope this helps!

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 11:46 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I am so anal....just lost 5 credits for deleting an answer that I had to correct spelling in. Help!!! :)

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 11:48 AM on Aug. 18, 2010