Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

so i told my son's daddy i have to put him on child support because i receive public assistance. all the details below.

last night i told him we needed to talk but i rather tell him in person. so he was just so eager to know. so i told him that i had to put him on child support because i have receive public assistance. and if i didnt they terminate my benefits forever. so he got mad at me and hung up the phone. now i thought i was being fair because i told before he would receive the notice in the mail and i didnt want to be a shock to him because i thought we were on good term i mean we talk on a regular basis. he got mad. i mean am i wrong for putting him on child support. my son and i need the health insurance. especially my son he has to have a surgery on his hands next month. i mean what kind of man gets mad when im looking out for the best for my son. do you think he thought i would be dumb enough to loose my benefits for him. he always make everything out to be my fault like i could have done something to prevent it from happening.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:38 AM on Aug. 18, 2010 in Money & Work

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • excuse the language but FUCK him and his issues. you are raising your son, apparently alone, and doing the best you can. years ago i applied for assistance and also gave my dd's sperm donor the same heads up and reacted pretty much the same as yours, but went as far to try to tell me he wasn't the dad, that we hadn't had sex and that i was harrassing his girlfriend. i ended up not needing the assistance (thankfully because the DHS didn't do a damn thing about going after him anyway and didn't explain why) due to a promotion, but at that point, i started wondering what the hell i was being so nice to that asshole for in the first place. it is his responsibility to take care of his child, and if he hasn't manned up to do it or to keep in touch and know what's going on in his son's life, then FUCK HIM... do what you have to do...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 12:54 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • No - he should be contributing to his child whether or not you are on PA.

    Answer by missanc at 10:39 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • it is completely within a states rights to seek alternate forms of support before using public assistance

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 10:39 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • He is responsible financially for your child, it's not wrong that he pay child support. He has no right to be upset - you are taking care of your child. He should have been paying child support all along.

    Answer by Scuba at 10:45 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • He should be thanking his luckly stars you didn't ask for child support before this. Your son is his child just as much as he is yours, and your ex should want to make sure his child is fed, clothed and taken care of.

    Answer by HotMama330 at 11:28 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • He is responsible to pay for his child regardless of what other assistance you recieve. He has no right to be mad for fufilling his parental duty.

    He should be happy that you forwarned him.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:40 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • If you need help w/ your child, he needs to help as well. If he voluntarily gives you money to help then I wouldn't pursue child support thru courts. However, if he's not helping or being willing to help then you have to do what you have to do to make sure you're childs needs are met :)

    Answer by JacqulynClayton at 10:40 AM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • You are not wrong for what you are doing. Your priority is to your child and not to his father. He should understand that your priority is to make sure your son's needs are met. If he doesn't understand then he will soon get over it.

    Answer by MakkarMom at 2:36 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • No you aren't wrong for seeking child support....I think you may be wrong for not doing it earlier, the dad should have always been contributing every penny he could.....but also in your question you talked about how you and your son need the health insurance. You can petition that if he has insurance he has to cover your son as well, but you can't get health insurance that way, you'd still have to apply for medicaid.

    Good Luck to you and your son.

    Answer by Mom2Jack04 at 5:41 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

Next question in Money & Work

Next question overall (Food & Drink)
Have you ever eaten a poptart?