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I tell me SO that im going to leave and he say's he doesnt care, do you think men say that even if they do care just to seem like a bigger man??

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:07 PM on Oct. 7, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Sometimes yes and sometimes no. You see men don't like to show emotions so they just hold it all in and half the time act like assholes instead of just saying how they feel and sitting down to talk about stuff it is easier for them to just be an ass about shit. Try approaching him in a calm matter and say that you really need to talk about some things that are hurting you and he should listen to you. He probably just don't know what to say when you throw I'm Leaving at him. And since you asked this question I am assuming that you really aren't gonna leave you are just threatening with it like I do sometimes cause you just want shit to change and thing between you two to be different?
    Peekalou

    Answer by Peekalou at 11:10 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • I think some men use it as reverse psychology. If they say "I don't care," they might be thinking that you'll change your mind because you're terrified that they won't care if you leave.

    Of course, if you're really going to leave...you should do it no matter what he says.
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 11:13 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Are you really going to leave or are you just trying to get a reaction out of him? Cuz if you are who cares what he thinks. If you aren't don't threaten it cuz you will never get the reaction from him that you really want. I threatend to leave so many times and things never changed. Now I'm getting a divorce- I', sad but sooo much better off to be getting out of a bad situaion. If you really want changes maybe trycounseling?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:18 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Basically this is what I have found: If you SAY you are leaving and he knows you won't, then of course he says he doesn't care. If you've said it before and haven't left, then he has no fear u will, or if he KNOWS that u won't leave bc say you have nowhere to go {like if u just moved to a new area or something}, then he has no fear, so he won't show his emotion. On the other hand, if he actually thinks you'll leave and he doesn't want you to go then he would never say he doesn't care. So assess the situation, if he has reason to believe u can and will leave and he says it, then he prob doesn't care. If for some reason he thinks u won't leave, then he's probably just not taking u seriously.
    Mers1803

    Answer by Mers1803 at 11:32 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • leave and find out.
    chyna_doll

    Answer by chyna_doll at 11:53 PM on Oct. 7, 2008

  • Depends on if he thinks it's an empty threat or no. If you've threatened to leave and you haven't? That could be the reason for his response. He has chosen not to react.
    SkyeGirl

    Answer by SkyeGirl at 12:09 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • It doesn't matter what he says. IMO you have to say what you mean and mean what you say. I'm guessing he's calling your bluff but then again since you aren't married maybe he doesn't care an he's ready to move on.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:18 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • I use to say that to my SO all the time and he never cared either. Than one day he went to his friends house and I told him he needed to come home to spend time with his family. He said he wasn't. I told him I was going to leave if he wasn't home in 15 mins (his friend lives 10 mins away). He wasn't home and I left. I haven't been back "home" in 3 months!!! He calls me everyday and apologizes and says he's so sorry! I guess he never thought I would really leave. I always left but i would come back the next day. Now he knows I'll really leave he misses me. Boys are crazy but I think girls can be crazier!
    Kenzies_momma

    Answer by Kenzies_momma at 12:24 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • My dh has said that too. Recently also. I told him it was over and he said "fine i'd be better off without you anyway!" Needless to say I couldn't get him to leave me alone...He might as well been hanging on to my feet everywhere I walked. I kicked him out and he kept coming back and squalling and begging me....Find out. I think they really learn their lesson when you leave. But you have to be persistant or they will just keep acting like a jerk...Stay gone for a week or more.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:45 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • If you're saying you're leaving just to see if he cares, then there's a better way of finding out. Have you tried asking him if he cares enough about you to have you stay in his life? If you're threatening to leave b/c you want him to change, what about talking to him first about the things you want him to change about himself? I don't think threatening to leave is ever a good idea. Same goes for threatening divorce. I have friends who always threaten divorce to get their spouse to "shape up"...I think that's dirty pool! Learn to communicate instead of threaten. Choose your battles carefully...let minors be minors and majors be majors...that means, don't blow your top b/c he left the seat up on the toilet, AGAIN. Instead let him know that you find it disrespectful when he does it b/c you've asked him MANY times to put it down... you know, stuff like that. Hope this helps!
    cuby

    Answer by cuby at 9:39 AM on Oct. 8, 2008

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