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5 year old jelousy

ever since my two year old was born my 5 year old will do things to get noticed when i am doing something with him. now she does it with the new baby. it come anf goes, but has been worse since the 2 month old was born. if i am feeding the baby, she will sit down and cry for no reason. she will baby talk to anyone who doesn't know her. she will eat things like corn and mac and cheese with her hands, because the two year old was doing it. i have tried to spend extra time with her, but it can be hard because she will try to be more of a baby than my two year old and i get frustrated with her. plus i have to take care of the new baby and that takes alot of my time. she has been doing this for 2 1/2 years and it isn't getting any better. if anyone has suggestions it would be great, so far we have been trying to ignore it, but that isn't helping. it can be so bad that new people think she is a very large 3 year old.


Asked by happy-go-lucky at 7:52 PM on Aug. 18, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (5)
  • She is no longer the baby in this family and she wants to be because the younger babies are getting the majority of the attention as far as she can see. Some how she needs to be able to feel like she is helping you with the other children so she won't focus on the fact that she feels left out of the picture. Maybe you can suggest that she pick her favorite book and read to them or more interaction with anything that's being done. I know from experience that a two month old and a 2 year old can require a lot of energy and attention in the course of a day. Tell her she can be your little helper and help with the other children and you will reward her for being a good big sister for it all. Maybe that will change her attitude toward it all.

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 8:23 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • Is she acting this way all the time or just at home? If it is just when she is at home competing for attention with the other kids I would ignore her. If it continues I would punish her for the behavior. Why should she be rewarded for this behavior? She needs to learn that the world doesn't revolve around her and that her siblings are just as important as she is. If it is an all the time problem, take her to a therapist. It isn't normal behavior.....

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 7:59 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • it is mostly at home but she does it other places too. i was at the bank a few weeks ago when i got told i had a big 3 year old. i have thought about taking her to a therapist, but my husband would have to be there for the first time and he says she doesn't need to go. when he is around she acts "normal" it is when it when he is gone that it starts.

    Comment by happy-go-lucky (original poster) at 8:08 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • sounds like someone doesn't like the new babies..... One saturday or sunday when Daddy isn't working you need to take her out & have one on one time with her & make it a soild thing. Leave babies with daddy & doing something with Just her. if hubby doesn't believe you tape her doing it. Show him the proof. It does sound like she needs some help.... When your at home & she starts acting that way, dont mind her. go on like shes not there (the crying fits) also try to get her involed with the babies. helping with the feedings & diapers.

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 8:14 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • Personally, I've never had to deal with regression, but I've read repeatedly that encouraging with 'big girl' activities and reminding and rewarding for good 'big girl' behavior works. If it were me, I would be insane after 2 1/2 yrs, so I would definitely have a serious talk about what is expected of 5 y/o's in your house and hold her to it. If she starts acting out when daddy leaves, send her to her room. Some reverse psychology might work too. If she wants to act like a baby, treat her like one. Put her in a diaper, put her down for a nap in the crib, give her bottles only for feeding. That might snap her out of it real quick, especially once she gets the taste of formula of expressed milk. GL

    Answer by midnightshadow2 at 11:07 PM on Aug. 21, 2010