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20wks preg. and my SO doesn't want to have possible TMI adult content

I'm 20 weeks pregnant, and my SO told me last week that he no longer wants to have sex with me. This, of course, made me cry and feel like I was disgusting to him. He told me that that is not the case, however I don't know why he won't. I mean, I could understand if I were 7 or 8 months pregnant and it made him uncomfortable, it will probably make me uncomfortable then too, but I don't know if I can last 20 more weeks, then 6+ weeks after that to have sex again. I know I can't make him, but I just don't know what to do or how to feel, and no one else I know has gone through this. Have any of you? If so, was it this early and how did you get through it?


Asked by xcassykayx at 9:56 PM on Aug. 18, 2010 in Pregnancy

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Answers (8)
  • Some guys are just too weirded out seeing and feeling their baby in their wife's belly. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I say get a good vibrator :)
    My DH and I didn't have much sex during our last pregnancy -- honestly neither one of us really felt like it much, so we just cuddled a lot instead.

    Answer by MommaofH2 at 10:06 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • My husband thought it was too weird to have sex towards the end of the pregnancy because he didn't want his 'thing' being that close to our babies face LOL!

    Answer by Misteh at 9:57 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • maybe he thinks that it will hurt the baby by squishing it or that he think he would be pokeing it. just ask him why and assure him that he will not hurt the baby in any way.

    Answer by laura970 at 9:59 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • I tried to suggest positions where he could not see my belly, but that didn't work. I've just started feeling the baby kick about a week ago, and of course I told you think that could have anything to do with it?

    Comment by xcassykayx (original poster) at 10:02 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • Have you talked about this with him? Maybe he is worried about hurting the baby or you...but you won't know what is going on his head and if his concerns are more fears or real issues if you don't talk.

    Answer by bookworm23 at 10:07 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • My husband was afraid sex was going t make me have a miscarriage and would have sex with me the whole pregnancy. Then he didn't want to after. The last 3+ years of our marriage we had no sex. He didn't have sex with any one else either. I suggest he talks to a counselor or someone so it doesn't turn out he never wants to have sex with you.


    Answer by Gailll at 10:07 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • i am sure he didn't mean any harm by it. like others have said, once they know it's truly in there and growing through movement and kicking, to them it just seems weird. my husband was the same way and i didn't take any offense to it whatsoever. i also agree with the PP, get a vibrator. I used mine alot. :)

    Answer by xtwilightx at 10:08 PM on Aug. 18, 2010

  • Thanks ladies. I think since this is my first pregnancy, it's not something I really expected to encounter which I why I somewhat took offense to it...guess I'm going to have to invest in some "products" for the time being.

    Comment by xcassykayx (original poster) at 10:12 PM on Aug. 18, 2010