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2 Bumps

How can I be polite about this?

My in laws have always liked my dh's cousin and his wife more then me, my dh and I feel like they wish his cousin was their son instead of dh. We had only girls, and all they wanted was a grandson. Dh's cousin had a son last Aug. anyway-My dh's cousin wife is pregnant with her second child, a girl this time. Her some will be 18 months old when the baby is born. My MIL called today to tell me she wants me to give them my highchair ( I just decided to try dd in a booster seat at the table and am not sure it will work yet), the double stroller and my crib! I co-sleep but dd does nap in her crib. Oh and they want all the clothes my girls have out grown (yes MIL bought a lot of them but still) I have cousins of my own that are pregnant and I want to make quilts out of the baby clothes I have kept. But if I say no to MIL I am being the worst person in the world. How can I politely decline to give all of my stuff away?

Answer Question
 
BusyBeesmom

Asked by BusyBeesmom at 10:51 AM on Aug. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (690 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • By politely declining.
    justnancyb

    Answer by justnancyb at 10:53 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Just let her know that you have already promised your things to other people. It was rude and presumptuous of her to assume that your DH's cousin could have your things.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 10:53 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • It is your stuff to hand out as you wish. MIL just needs to get over it.
    countryspun

    Answer by countryspun at 10:53 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Honestly, I would just say, I'm not sure I'm ready to give up my baby furniture quite yet & just tell her that you will give some to the cousin's wife, but you have cousins also that you would like to help out. I think that that's extremely rude of her to tell you to do.
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 10:53 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • It is your stuff. Just say no.
    Mommy2Gabrielle

    Answer by Mommy2Gabrielle at 10:53 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • She bought it for you and gave it as a gift. If she expected for you to return it, she should have said so at the time that she gave it to you. It is now your stuff and you can decide what to do with it.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:54 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • You can say, I'm really glad they're having a baby, but those things are mine and I will give them what I please. It's not up to you what I give away.
    I personally would not be polite about it either.
    Mom2unangel

    Answer by Mom2unangel at 10:54 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Just tell her,

    That your cousin had already taken the clothes because she is pregnant.

    Im going through this right now..My husbands cousin is 18 and pregnant..All of my daughters clothes were bought by us or hand me dowsn from my family....They told my husband that they would like all the clothes my daughter grew out of and my husband told them ur going to have to talk to her about that...she has yet to call me because she knows ill tell her no, because we are going to be having another child.
    SunShineMoMM

    Answer by SunShineMoMM at 10:54 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I would just politley ok. go through YOUR things and divid them amoung the pregnant people. give what you want to whom you want. what is left his cousing can have. If your MIL says anything just tell her oh I'm sorry I gave that to so and so. take into account who it due first who is having what. She doesn't get a say what and who you give YOUR stuff to regardless if she bought it or not. If later she wants to know why your cousin got an item other then the in-law just tell her you forgot in-law wanted it.
    lovemybaby283

    Answer by lovemybaby283 at 10:55 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Your MIL is the one who's being impolite, offering someone else's things to someone else. Say that you've already promised your old baby stuff to your cousins, but if there's anything they don't want, you'll let her know. And she's in the wrong, so don't worry about her thinking you're the bad guy.
    SWasson

    Answer by SWasson at 10:56 AM on Aug. 19, 2010

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