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My daughter is almost 10, do I initiate the birds and the bees conversation, or just wait for her to come to me?

Should I talk to her, and if so how much info do I give?

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Asked by jennypenny3000 at 2:51 PM on Aug. 19, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (2 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • If you wait for her to come to you, the conversation may not go exactly along the lines you think it will. It may be more like, now i'm a grandma!

    You don't need to go into details at this age. You do need to set standards as to what kind of touching is appropriate, and what you expect as far as boys go.

    Answer by lovinangels at 2:54 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Ask her what she knows/has heard already. Then inform her of the truth. Don't go into too much detail but don't sugarcoat. Tell her what you expect of her when it comes to sex. 1st AF is around the corner so make sure she knows about that also.

    Answer by keisha613 at 2:54 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • don't do a sit down and make it all about that, it could just make her uncomfortable. let her come and ask the questions, make it as relaxed as possible. that way when she is ready to get bc she will come to you instead of hiding it.

    Answer by natasha86 at 2:55 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • WHOA...She is 10. Her time is close. You need to have the whole conversation. I mean the WHOLE enchilada. She is going to be told things in school and she needs to hear from you the correct facts. She should have already had at least little talks hear and there. I had the talk with my son at 10 and he wasn't going to possibly be starting a period and getting breasts soon.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 2:56 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I would bring it up and make the conversation casual and relaxed but I would not wait for her because she may never come to you. out of fear or whateva I never went to anyone. I would not go into to much detail unless she ask alot of question and has false info on things then I would lay it out. but dont think because she is ten she dont know about it because somebody's child at school is talking.

    Answer by Sky_Mom at 3:01 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Ok, so I'm not trying to be dumb, but what details do I give? Do I say when your older , grown , you'll meet someone etc. Do I talk about the physical stuff? Do I say when you start to like boys? I have no clue...spell it out for me girls. sorry, haha. I want her to be prepared and hear it from me, but i'm so scared of giving her too much info.

    Comment by jennypenny3000 (original poster) at 3:13 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I went to my 10 yo daughter a couple of weeks ago and told her everything b/c I dont want her to hear it from someone else 1st.... they do sex ed in 5th grade

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 3:17 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • u can talk to her but be careful on the words you use.

    Answer by michelle34231 at 3:32 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I'm still not clear on what to say. Do I just say, "When you have questions or hear things you can come to me." Or, do I say, " I want to talk to you about sex, do you know what that is?" If she says no, I'll be like , good, let's go watch tv. If she says yes, then I'll clarify things for her. Seriously, if she says no, do I say come to me when you're ready, or tell her what it is?

    Comment by jennypenny3000 (original poster) at 3:41 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I thought they had mandatory sex ed in school ...

    Answer by tasches at 3:47 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

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