Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Desperate HELP and advice needed.....

Hello im a mother of 2 boys but i have a dear friend who has a 15 year old step daughter that doesnt live with her but lives with her aunt and she just found out shes pregnant with TWINS!!!!!!! The step daughter had everyone believing she was a virgin and wouldnt become sexually active anytime soon...well my friend finds out shes been sneaking out of the house to meet this 25 year old guy since last year and now shes 6 mo pregnant and says they are his! To make a long story short my dear friend is trying to inform the step daughter know that babies are a big responibility and her life will be on pause..well the step daughte doesnt want to hear it & she says shes keeping them! What advice can she give this young girl whos life is about to be turned upside down...btw the 15 years mother is not in the picture..so my friend trying to do everything she can to persuede her the child would have a better life given up for adoption..

Answer Question
 
HOTMOMS23

Asked by HOTMOMS23 at 3:41 PM on Aug. 19, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 4 (40 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • It's no one but the 15 y/o's choice. If she has them, she can keep them. You can explain options, but, she may not want to or care.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 3:44 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Moms need to do what works for them, regardless of age. Yes twins are a lot of work, I would bet that the girl needs support not advice and she make the adoption decision herself (once they come)
    Mommy2Gabrielle

    Answer by Mommy2Gabrielle at 3:44 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • How about your friend seeking some counseling for the girl? Have her try to locate some teen pregnancy resources.
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 3:45 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • p.s. that 25 year old should be ARRESTED!
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 3:45 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • Even though its sad that shes pregnant at 15, its her choice..... Support her the best way you can, without pressuring her. The more you push her to give them up, the more shes going to hold it against you & fight you. tell her her choices.
    lilmoosesmom

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 3:47 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • maybe the father of the twins will be helping? or his family? i don't really think it is anyone's best interest to try to force a young woman to give her children up for adoption. the girl has issues, and who wouldn't, really.she probably feels like her mother and father gave her up, and she might feel like she can do better than that. counseling would be very good. also, she needs to really take extra good care of her body and eat a ton of food!!!
    happy2bmom25

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 3:49 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • yes....kimberlyinberea....they cant do a thing till the babies are born according to the state of nc...he says they never had sex...and she says they did....paternity test is waiting for the babies when they arrive! thank you ladies for the advice


    HOTMOMS23

    Comment by HOTMOMS23 (original poster) at 3:49 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • I agree that some counseling would be good for her for many reasons, not the least of which is that she might be more open to talking to an unbiased third party who knows the right questions to ask and who doesn't have a history with your step daughter. I would also have her watch some of the show 16 and Pregnant from MTV. It shows a pretty fair assessment of those girls' lives, or seems to at least. If I had seen that as a teenager I think it would have scared the crap out of me. Not that you want to scare her but I doubt she truly has any idea what she is in for and it will be a tough road no matter what she chooses. There was a couple on the first season of the show who did go with adoption and it was heartbreaking to watch but also inspirational to see them make such a hard choice for the good of their daughter.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:09 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • MaryMW i saw that one..........yes it was an awesome season watching the couple transition but the baby went to a great famiily it seemed.....GREAT IDEA! thanks
    HOTMOMS23

    Comment by HOTMOMS23 (original poster) at 4:24 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

  • i would support her in every way u can! its going to be hard for her and she will need help! its to bad she got pregnant but it happens and we just need to make the best of it! good luck!
    p.s. arrest the 25 year old! and make him pay child support!
    Caroline2010

    Answer by Caroline2010 at 4:24 PM on Aug. 19, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.