Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

DD just started preK and cries not wanting to go. Help.

She's 4 and just started a 1/2 day preK on Wed. She only goes 8:20 to 11:20. She still eats lunch and naps at home. The school is super close to our home, so I can get there fast. We are locked into a year contract; we pay $6,000 for the year whether she goes or not. This is a private preK thru 12th grade school. In order to get her accepted we needed to start her with preK or she might not have be accepted next year as a Kindergartener.

Her teacher says she does well once she's there and doesn't cry until she sees me there to pick her up. She says she has fun at school and at home sings the songs they learn at school. When it's time to get ready in the mornings she cries and says she doesn't want to go.

Has anyone been through this? Have any advice?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:35 AM on Aug. 20, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (9)
  • She'll get used to it. You said she just started so its all new for her. She will love it once she gets over not being able to be with you. My niece is starting prek this year too and doesnt want to go because she doesnt want to meet new kids! She's a spoiled only child...

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 8:39 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • Give her time and praise her on the good mornings. You could even make a no cry chart at home. She gets a sticker for each day she goes to school 'happy' for every so many stars, 10 is a good number, she can get a prize. Either a Happy Meal or a trip to the park or a small toy...

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:46 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • Teacher here: THIS is why you pay for preschool. So they can get use to going and being away from mommy now, instead of the Kindergarten year that is VERY important.

    Its very normal for a child to cry like this, and its wonderful that she gets over it quick and has fun! It sounds like it just transition time that is hard for her, and that just takes practice.

    My biggest advice is DONT wavier. Its school day, you GO to school. No talking mommy out of it! If she knows she can cry her way out of going, it will get worse! Also, make goodbyes sweet and fast. "I love you have a good day, bye" and LEAVE. If you hover, it makes her transition harder and she will not be able to conquer fear :)

    I taught preschool for a long time and saw this over and over again. You are doing the best thing for her :)

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 8:47 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • yeah she'll get over it. just drop her off, give her a kiss and leave. if you want to, stand outside the door and just listen for a little bit. or if the office has a monitor, watch her on that. i guarentee you she'll stop earlier and earlier every day. it's best just to drop her and leave. staying just makes it worse. i know this, i used to be a preschool teacher till i had kids. then i became a SAHM. i dropped my son off at hourly care every now and then, i did that and in 2 days he could've cared less i left, didn't even say bye lol.

    working in preschool, i know some kids like to scream and cry when mommy leaves, they're perfect all day, then as soon as they see mommy/daddy, they start crying, so it makes their parents feel bad for them and think they've had the worst day ever. before you walk in the door, look through a window or something. don't let her see you. you'll see how she really acts when you're not there. :)

    Answer by armywife43 at 8:47 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • my dd is the same way.. they get over it. she actually gets mad now when she see's that i'm there to pick her up. haha. they make friends and have fun.. and i truly believe that once you leave the crying stops. i've had to put my dd in summer camps through the summer to help ease the transition once school starts in the fall. staying home w/ me through the summer made it difficult on her. good luck it gets easier on you both.

    Answer by DNR at 8:48 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • she'll get over it try not to let it upset you...she just needs to go thru this there is no other way she will get over it. try not to let it get you or worry, mama

    Answer by cattiesmom78 at 6:06 PM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • My daughter did the same thing. Just keep taking her, hug her and walk away. If the teacher says she is fine after you leave, then let her be! I know it's hard, it broke my heart to leave mine crying like that, but I promise you, it is worth it!

    Answer by khedy at 6:32 PM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • They are all right. She senses your discomfort. I bet that you are having a bigger problem with school than she is. Stick to it. The crying will end when she finds out that it does not get her extra attention. Take her in give her a big hug and kiss, say good bye and leave.
    Our preschool has about 4 different activities going on for the child to choose from and join in. One teacher is greeting, The director is in the hall greeting and the other teacher is leading a craft. There is lots to do and the kids want to be part of the fun.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 3:38 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • i went thru this, i think she'll get over it

    Answer by san78 at 9:29 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.