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what would you do in this situation?

the other day i was in a waiting room with my kids, and it had toys for them to play with. my son was doing just fine getting along with the other kids, playing together, then this mom comes with her dd and she starts playing with a toy. my ds wanted to play with it a couple minutes later, she wouldn't let him and pushed him away a couple of times (it was the kind on the wall, where flip the tiles and can change their clothes, there were 2 different sides, so 2 kids could play on it) he came and told me she wasn't sharing, so i just told him to wait his turn. he waited, and waited...and then finally she walked away to play with something else. he went over there and started playing, then she went over there and wanted to play with it again. he told her no, she pushed him, so naturally, he pushed back. they were pushing each other. i went over there and told the girl it didn't have her name on it, it's his turn. (continued)

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:05 AM on Aug. 20, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (11)
  • another mom who was sitting nearby said my son had started it, saying they were playing fine until he started pushing her. i just rolled my eyes and told my son to be the bigger kid and share the toy, and showed him how to share. from there they played with it just fine.

    what would you have done in that situation? would you have done the same thing? or would you have went up there sooner and told the girl to share? or something else?
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:07 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • i would have been the bigger person and just removed my child from that equation.
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 11:08 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • I would have asked the other Mom to help me handle it, or stay out of it unless someone was gonna really get hurt. They need to learn to fend for themselves and problem solve sometimes.
    What you did wasn't wrong though. Just another option
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 11:08 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • I would have had mine go to another toy and explained that some kids don't know how to share and sometimes it is better find a new toy than get into a pushing match.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:10 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • If the mother of the other child wasn't going to do anything about the situation, I would just redirect my own child because of the physical conflict.
    Erin814

    Answer by Erin814 at 11:13 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • People have different values. You say "she pushed him, so naturally he pushed back." That isn't how many people think or raise their kids. What would be natural is to walk away. That is what I would expect my child to do.


    I wouldn't have gone over and told the litte girl "it didn't have her name on it'", rolled my eyes, or done anything that made a scene in the doctor's office.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:14 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • Yeah, this might not have been a good thing to let your son see or hear. "I wouldn't have gone over and told the litte girl "it didn't have her name on it'", rolled my eyes, or done anything that made a scene in the doctor's office."
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:20 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • pshh...i'm not the only one that said it didn't have her name on it either. another mom that was sitting next to me was watching as well, although she didn't tell me how to handle it, i heard her mumble under her breath that it didn't have her name on it. so i at least knew SOMEONE agreed with me.

    and he's 3, with a little sister. it wasn't natural for him to hit or push back when she first started doing it to him, but after a while he got fed up and just started doing it. so yes, for most kids, especially with siblings, it's natural
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:23 AM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • If the mother of the other child wasn't doing anything I would have just said that pushing was not ok and that we all need to share. If she didn't stop I would have simply removed my child from the situation.
    psugal

    Answer by psugal at 4:29 PM on Aug. 20, 2010

  • I just remove my child from kids like that and situations like that. Now if the girl came over to where I removed the child and started stuff then I step in..

    I think you are probably upset the mother of that girl did nothing-she should have been watching and also telling her daughter to share and such-I know parents like that bug me too.
    cattiesmom78

    Answer by cattiesmom78 at 6:04 PM on Aug. 20, 2010

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