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Have you realized your not " in love" with your S.O or DH? adult content

He has put me through so much it has really killed all of my passion. I loved him more then I have ever loved anyone els. He has broken my heart and hurt my feelings so many times I am to the point I don't want another relationship. But we are sexually compatible? We have the best sex ever. We are 100% comfortable and happy in that area. I used to think when the feelings were gone thats when sex started to go down hill. Now I think thats all that hold us together for both of us. (please don't respond if your going to just tell me it's time to go, I should leave etc.) As for a "relationship" he seems to be putting more effort into lately. He is also being faithfull at this time, (as far as I know). Has anyone els been in this situation ?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:12 AM on Aug. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • If sex is all you two have, the question is, Is that all that you want from a relationship?

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 6:38 AM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • maybe you are in love with him, but still too hurt or angry and bitter to realize it. its a nasty thing for someone you 'have loved more than anyone' to hurt you. you don't just bounce back, and because you don't want to feel that hurt again, you don't easily let them back into your heart.
    i'm sure you do love him, you just need to forgive him. once you come to terms with this, and realize that no one is always going to perfect, and that humans fail each other (who knows, perhaps YOU have failed him, too??), you can get past whatever it is blocking you from being happy with him. love is a verb, OP. its rarely automatic; most of us have to put in some effort, and act on it, or its not going to be there. sex won't keep the relationship going, unless you plan on doing it 24/7. you and he will have to decide to love again.

    Answer by dullscissors at 6:43 AM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • he seems to be putting more effort into lately

    sounds to me like you two have have a good chance
    you said he has hurt you more than once, and you do still remember loving him tons, so those are great signs

    IMO, if you did not love him, you would have a hard time remembering the feeling you had for him
    and sexx will not keep you two together, but if you were not having, then you would have a much bigger hill to climb

    gl, sounds like you can make it work, especially if he is trying too

    Answer by fiatpax at 7:30 AM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • My husband and I went through a very rocky patch where I thought I didn't love him. He was devastated, but didn't give up on me. As it turned out, I was very depressed and overwhelmed and didn't even know it. Is it possible that your husband is depressed? Overwhelmed at work and maybe taking it out on you? I would suggest counseling. We went. I don't think that's what saved us - I think my husband saved me - he didn't give up. If you want to save your marriage - don't give up on your husband. If he is giving something to the relationship you need to try as well. Good Luck.

    Answer by mpeada at 7:39 AM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • i feel i am not in love with my bf like i used to be but i do love him.our problems are easily fixable but alot of it is on his end as in he needs to do somethings and i am still waiting on that been waiting for yrs. something has happened recently and i have done a lot of thinking and i realize that i wont leave him that i do really want to be with him and be a family with our 2 kids.

    Answer by alyssa1 at 11:26 AM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • good luck i hope it all works out for the best

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 12:28 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • i think once you get used to all the negative its hard to adjust to the say your not leaving so then make the best of it give him a chance.try to reopen your heart he may not break it this time

    Answer by sunflower39346 at 12:58 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

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