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I read that telling a baby "NO" is bad for the self-esteem, do you believe this? do you do this?

I use to tell my kids "no" all the time but ever since I read in a baby book that telling a baby "no"" is actually bad for there self esteem I have changed it to explaining why it's not acceptable to do. I guess it does make sense but it is soo hard to break out of the habit. Do you tell your kids "no"? do you believe this is true?

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Asked by babyangelromero at 1:04 PM on Aug. 21, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 17 (4,048 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • I usually say no, and then explain why.

    Answer by lovinangels at 1:06 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • I don't believe in it. Of course I say no, I just try to always explain why I said no.

    Answer by mygirlpaige at 1:07 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • I say no. I was told no growing up and my self-esteem is fine.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 1:07 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • well i only have a 9month old baby boy & i say no to him but he dont really know what im saying

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 1:10 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • I say no alot, but in the process of saying no you much as you need for a certain age. I dont believe telling them no is bad for them. i dont really understand can discipling them with no damage them? unless of course ur doing it all the time and for inappropriate reasons

    Answer by SweetPoison at 1:12 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • When adults tell kids no often it is ineffective. Kids tune it out. Toddlers start saying no all the time to their parents. You don't have anything left for the important situations. I save no and stop for important (no) and emergency (stop) situations. I converse a lot with my toddler grandson and in doing so can avoid using no. If I slip and say no in a somewhat loud voice it startles him and he looks aroud to see what's wrong because he knows it's an important word. He is 23 mo and responds to no and stop. It's important because I'm disabled and can't catch him. I think it is better to say parenting without saying no builds self esteem. Here is a famous article about saying no.


    Answer by Gailll at 1:13 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • LOL! Yeah, it's bad for my self esteem too, but unfortunately, this is life. We all have to get used to be told No.

    Answer by m-avi at 1:13 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • Telling a child "NO" is fine and will definitely not hurt his or her self esteem. I think explaining to a child why you said no is important and also sets boundaries for the child. Not telling a child no can lead to the child having a false sense of entitlement and possibly having a negative effect in during the teen years and ultimately in adulthood.

    Answer by JusNikki at 1:14 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • What I've heard (and what makes sense to me) is that if you say no too often, it desensitizes them to it. It's better to practice something like redirection, tell them what they can do instead of what they can't do. Still say no sometimes, to teach them what it means, but save it for when you need a reaction, like when they're about to pick up the antique crystal vase at a friend's house, or when they're heading towards the street.

    Answer by DragonRiderMD at 1:16 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

  • Oh good GOD, and we wonder why kids and teens are out of controll these days. Well they may be disrespectfull and rude and obnoxious but DAMN they have GREAT self esteem

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 1:18 PM on Aug. 21, 2010

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