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what is the best way to handle a 16 year old who will not go to school?

He wouldn"t go to the high school so i got him into an ALC program and he has been not following the rules and tells teachers off he hits walls and he was tested and they said he has Asbergers syndrom he feels he doesnt. they want him to go to a special school and he refuses. I have tried everything i can and now he is staying with friends because he doesn't want to go to a "retard school" as he put it. I believe it is the best place for him. He has punched holes in my walls and just wants to do things his way, Unacceptable to me! Please help!!!

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desperate421

Asked by desperate421 at 2:47 PM on Oct. 8, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I would go to school with him. Everyday. Until he can take responsibility to go on his own... Embarass him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • Stop spending money on him, don't buy him extra things. Only buy him thing that he need to survive. I would strip his bedroom of all extra thing like tv,dvd,phone,sterio,ipodes,etc,,,,,...Tell him to get a job. And scense he's not working make him pay you rent
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:53 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • PUt your foot down! Don't take anymore of his BS...take away ALL of his privlages, don't let him see his friends and if he sneaks out at night send the cops on him. It's cruel but you can't take his crap forever. And don't tell him you're putting him in a special school just put him there! And tell him if he doesn't go to school than he needs to get a job and help pay the bills and if he doesn't do that than ship him off to military school or job core.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 2:55 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • I ment scence he's not going to school make him pay rent
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:55 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • It's "since" actually.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 2:59 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • This is an individual decision. But you have to take his feelings in to account! If he is unhappy in his school, you will never get the desired effect. I don't know much about Asbergers but, I know it is related to Autism and some cases are more sever than others. I personal believe my own son my be borderline Autistic but, I havent had him tested. You need to find some way to compomise. If he feels like he is in a "Retard School" you will destroy his self-esteem an that will be counter productive to your goal.
    amydh

    Answer by amydh at 3:23 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • The other posters obviously do not understand that a child with Asbergers is different than the normal teenager.
    amydh

    Answer by amydh at 3:25 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • Have you ever considered homeschooling? I know that Asbergers is a little different, but my sister started homeschooling her 14 year old step son with ADHD, and her 11 year old daughter that has mild brain damage from having a brain tumor removed and they're doing really good with their school work now.
    Lornamay

    Answer by Lornamay at 3:57 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • You need intervention from the school before probation gets involved and he ends up in the juvenile system. You need to go to the school district offices and speak to the person in charge of special education. You are legally responsible for your child and anything they do until they are 18. If he is not going to school you can also be turned into the school review board for truancy and could face criminal repercussion as well as your son. Don't let your child run you over.
    goinginsane1

    Answer by goinginsane1 at 5:37 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • BTW... I am a mother of a special needs child with severe behavior disorders and also worked in special education for over 7 years.
    goinginsane1

    Answer by goinginsane1 at 5:37 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

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