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2 Bumps

I'm 7 weeks pregnant, the father wants NOTHING to do with "us", and that's fine, but I'm scared, and confused... advice?? adult content

This is a little personal, but I have no where else to go. The father, I recently found out, is a drug addict. (he had been sober for a year when the baby was concieved) He, and his family want me to have an abortion. I'm pro-choice, but MY choice, is to keep it. adoption is still in the picture, but I'm already attached to my belly, and I don't think I can go through with that. I was told about 3 years ago, I would never be able to get pregnant, so this might be the only chance I ever get to be a Mom. I'm just scared, and if anyone has any advice, I'm more than willing to listen. Thank You.

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MissLaLa03

Asked by MissLaLa03 at 3:52 AM on Aug. 22, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Aww sweetie I am sooo sorry and I know how you feel my ex got clean till after I got pregnant but I tried to make things work.... I recommend that you do not go down that path. There should be local shelters that will help you unless I am wrong and you have a place to live. I will add you ok. N you can face book me too ok
    agriffinmom4

    Answer by agriffinmom4 at 3:56 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • GIRL...WITH OR WITHOUT HIM YOU WILL SO GREAT AND BE A GOOD MOM! I HOPE YOU DONT ABORT...BABYS ARE SO PRECIOUS...AND ADOPTION WELL IF YOU FEEL YOU CANT DO IT ON YOUR OWN, YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT YOU THINK IS BEST FOR THAT BABY! BUT I THINK YOU NIGHT BE BETTER OFF ON YOUR OWN WITH YOU AND THE BABY...YOU DONT WANT AN ADDICT AROUND YOU AND YOUR NEWBORN...FOR SOOOO MANY REASONS! MAYBE ITS BEST IF HES OUT OF THE PICTURE...HE MIGHT BE MORE OF A HANDFUL THAN YOU BABY! GOOD LUCK!
    ESMISMOMMY

    Answer by ESMISMOMMY at 3:56 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • You will be fine! When that baby is born & you feel that CRAZY love, you will realize that the two of you can overcome any obstacle!

    Do you have any friends or family that are supporting your decision?
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 4:16 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • Every pregnancy is scary whether it is planned or not. Even my planned pregnancies scared me. I am having my 3rd and this was a very unplanned baby but it is a blessing. I was also told no more babies for me 16yrs ago. Maybe your situation isn't ideal for you but this baby is probably a gift because you were told you couldn't have children. It is a huge responsibility but the best thing in life is to have children. Children just need your love and everything else will come....

    Do what your heart says and you will be a great mother. Best wishes and if I may say...Congratulations!
    Congenial

    Answer by Congenial at 4:17 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • Men like that are what give all dads a bad reputation, please don't let one really bad egg ruin your perception of all men out there, there are some goodies.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 4:38 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • my cousin went through something like that. she had been dating a guy for a year and ended up pregnant. the guy left her and told her to get rid of it but my cousin just couldnt do it. so he told her to kill herself, she didnt thankfully. during her pregnancy she found out that he had an 8 year old and a four year old that he didnt see or take care of. at the end of her pregnancy she found out that he had gotten another girl pregnant who was due a month after my cousin. that was two years ago. she is raising her baby by herself and while sometimes its hard, she wouldnt change it for anything. im sorry you are going through this but you need to know that you wont be the first single mom or the last. if you want to have this baby and raise it do it. if you let anyone else talk you out of it you will regret it. it sounds like to me that you already love your baby. you can do this!
    jamiethornton26

    Answer by jamiethornton26 at 7:21 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • You can do it....Just remember one thing if you don't want to be with him, then don't. Don't do it for the baby it can make things so much worse. Do it only if your comfortable and you think it will be a healthy lifestyle for you and your child. But on the other hand I was a single mother when I was only 18 and his family wanted me to abort. I didn't and it was no picnic trying to be a single young mother working, daycare, school for me, and trying to go out once in while. We have since worked out most of our differences and can at least be in each others presence but my DS is 10 now. It was a long hard road but I wouldn't ever have changed it for anything.
    Finkette

    Answer by Finkette at 9:21 AM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • You need to truly gain some self-esteem and remember that you and the baby are the most important thing, period. I wouldn't worry about what his family is saying, or what his past tendencies have been. This is here and now, and you need to do what's best for you and have enough confidence to make those decisions. The worst thing that women do is engage in low self-esteem and bounce back into negative situations with men that are toxic. If you are in the right place emotionally and financially to take care of the baby - then do so. If not, do what's right for the child and either put it up for adoption, or consider other options.
    MandyRowland

    Answer by MandyRowland at 10:52 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • let his ass go, no woman needs a man to be complete n u can do it on ur own even if its hard, but who wants a dog? im a single parent
    chriskris

    Answer by chriskris at 10:53 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • Hi came across your story and its similar to mine. I am 7 weeks pregnant, I had a blighted ovum before and the doctors told me that I probably wouldn't be able to have children. The guy I am pregnant by is very happy about it. Except now since he found out I am pregnant , we are no longer together and he just wants to be friends. Meanwhile I want him so much more. That and the fact that I have no money and I'm sh*tting myself about surviving whilst pregnant. I was a dancer but the doctors have advised me not to dance.
    Miss-Daisy2010

    Answer by Miss-Daisy2010 at 8:39 AM on Sep. 28, 2010

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