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About my 4 year olds sexual nature is it normal?

She is very flirty with males, she was very young when she started playing with herself, now she has all kinds of questions and wants to see everyone naked male and female. She talks about growing up and having babys. She rubs her self on pillows, blankets, like in a humping motion, and even sometimes on people. I keep talking to her about it, but how normal is this and should I be worried? My mother in law is worried about it and says it is not normal.

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Asked by Myjoy82 at 4:43 PM on Oct. 8, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (9)
  • My sisters little boy is 6 and still rubs the carpet.. Mine 5yrs old son, freakn plays with his all the time... I have to tell him it will fall off he keeps touching it... I think its normal... I just have to keep a close eye on what is on tv when he is in the room...

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 4:47 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • There is a whole range of normal. Some of the stuff your daughter does would kind of worry me too and I would ask her very non-threateningly where she gets these ideas. The flirty thing with men would worry me most, but she could just be copying an adult if you are flirty or she spends time with someone she admires who is. Masturbation is totally normal for kids, just teach her some boundaries around it. My daughter is also very into talking about growing up and having babies, she wants a lot of them and is always telling me things that she will or not do with them (her babies can eat all the candy they want etc). I think that's normal too, kids don't associate sexual organs/feelings with growing up and having babies.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 4:53 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • If you see physical signs of abuse or she says anything that concerns you, don't hesitate to get her into counselling to find out what is going on and help her with it.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 4:54 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • its normal my 2yr old figured out what his pee pee is and he wont keep his diaper on so i have to put shorts or pants on him or he will come running butt naked yelling i gotta pee pee mommy!! so yea its normal!

    Answer by 4lyfe56 at 4:54 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • I don't know if it's normal to be that interested in "herself" and flirting already. I think the growing up to have babies thing is normal for little girls b/c we give them dolls and expect them to want that. I would get her checked out or ask a doc... something. Make sure there's no abuse, daycare or wherever. I know it's hard ot think fo but it kind of seems like that could be a possibility

    Answer by AshJoe05 at 5:02 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • Well, I would venture to say that most of this is normal... as far as flirting goes, are you sure you aren't just over exagerating? I say this because, all little girls have a tendancy to behave a little babyish from time to time, maybe you are mistaken that for flirting.... Anyway, if not and you actually believe she is doing something abnormal, check it out with her Dr. Don't label her as a bad child or anything like that.... And don't call attention to it... Just quietly as the Dr.

    Answer by pupmom at 5:17 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • I can't say for everything, but I know my sons talk about growing up to be daddies all the time. If you're concerned, talk to her doctor. Tell him/her what she's doing and see what they say.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:39 PM on Oct. 8, 2008

  • Honestly, for the most part it's normal, the "masturbating" and talking about being a mommy, my 2 years old, carries her babydoll around and feed her and what not. Only part I question, is the humping of people and the flirting with men...that I would kinda cause for alarm, because (i worked with children for years), I haven't come in contact with a child humping my leg, and any children that I have seen do things of that nature, may not necesarrily mean that they are being abused, but that they have "seen" stuff happen, whether it be on TV or personal (not meaing it was done to them). I had a 3 years old in my class, that wanted to french kiss, and touch little girls body parts because he seen his 21 year old aunt and her boyfriend (who was living with his mother) fool around. Mother and Aunt didn't know he was watching.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:13 AM on Oct. 9, 2008

  • cont.....I would just say pay attention to what she is watching from now on, and who she's around (especially any teenagers, or young adults) and explain to her her boundaries, and if she keeps doing it outside those boundarie lines, there might need to be consequences, not for the "act" but for not following the rules ABOUT the act, if that can be understood! lol...

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Oct. 9, 2008

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