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would this bother you or would you like it if your mother-inlaw always cleaned your teens room?

My mother inlaw always comes over and cleans my kids bedrooms. She even goes through their drawers, desk and backpacks and cleans them out. This upsets my children and they try to not be rude to her, they ususally stay out of their rooms and complain to me about it. I've told my mother inlaw that I wanted them to be responsible for their own rooms and not even make their bed, but she does it anyways.

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Asked by prettybaby1 at 1:36 PM on Aug. 22, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 9 (181 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • I would absolutely love it. Tell your kids to clean their rooms before she gets there. That way she will not be able to do it for them.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 1:37 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • Yikes!! Sounds like she needs some boundaries. Good job to you on raising polite well mannered children. I can imagine some teens would let Grandma know they didn't want her in their rooms ;)

    Answer by blessedwithree at 1:38 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • Yeah this would make me upset. may be that I don't like my mother in law, though. lol. But she should respect your decision on your way of running your household, and yes it would bother me and I would take it as an insult if my mil did that in my home.

    Answer by Kword at 1:38 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • That would make me upset, my kids rooms are their private space. Maybe have your DH talk with her? She shouldn't be snooping, that's so rude.

    Answer by Scuba at 1:39 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • I personally wouldnt mind at all! BUT..I can see how it would bother the teens. Like other poster said, I would tell your kiddos to try to have thier rooms nice and tidy before she comes over and then she'll have no reason to do it.
    She's probably just wanting to help them, not realizing how they may feel about it.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 1:39 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • They need to say something if it bothers them. Saying something to you is not going to mke it stop. GL Momma

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 1:40 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • My MIL tried this, she had invited herself to stay with us and started "helping" by cleaning DD's room. I had already had enough of her and kind of blew up at her and told her that she could quit trying to run our house or she could go home. She still "helps" our younger daughter clean her room, but she stays out of our teen's room.

    Answer by scout_mom at 2:28 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • She's over stepping her boundaries as a grandmother by cleaning those bedrooms and invading their privacy. Put your foot down and ban her from doing so.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 3:52 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • While it is nice that she wants to be 'helpful' (or snoop- whatever the case may be) I do think that she needs to respect your wishes and respect the children's wishes and their privacy. I would sit her down and tell her that it is nice that she wants to help, BUT you want the kids to take responsibility for their things and clean up after themselves. I would also tell her that the kids are getting up there in age where they want their privacy and that she needs to respect their wishes. If she is hurt, that is too bad, she needs to realize just because SHE wants to do it does not make it ok with others. If she really feels she MUST clean, could you compromise and save a chore for her-- like maybe cleaning the bathroom? That way she will still feel 'helpful' and 'useful' but she won't be bothering anyone's things or disrupting privacy.

    Answer by MizLee at 8:15 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • This would make me very upset. My son's rooms are theirs and they do clean them the way they want.

    Answer by SVSASHER at 9:42 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

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