It's reasonable to believe that in the marriage (and relationship with step children) there is to be mutual respect with no exceptions. Disregard to that respect should hold consequences. Talk with your h and determine what those consequences should be then both of you sit down with the difficult children and set these boundaries as a couple. That way you are not the wicked step mother making all the rules. As adults, these children should be living their own life and not tormenting your's. If they live with you encourage them to be independent (and leave). If they have their own home and life, politely yet firmly encourage them to devote their time and attention to them.
at 10:33 AM on Jun. 30, 2008