Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

How much lee-way (sp) do you give to your kids for being late?

If they are at a friends house and you tell them to be home at say...7:00 pm. They CALL you at 7:10 pm and say I'm checking in.
What do you do?
Are you cool with it?
Do you make them come on home?
Do they get a lecture about timeliness?

My son has a bad habit of being late. I don't want to be so strict on just a few minutes...but here lately, I give an inch, he takes a mile.
So, I'm trying to decide how I should handle his being late for checking in or coming home from his friends house.
His dad is NOTORIUSLY late for EVERYTHING...and has never show any concern for the people that were waiting on him.This is what I'm trying to avoid happening to my son. I want him to realize that being punctual and on time is important and it does matter and it does affect those that are waiting for you.
What do you think?


Asked by kimberlyinberea at 7:16 PM on Aug. 22, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 29 (39,262 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • give him a watch syncronize it with your clock at home if he calls late or comes home late he loses priveleges maybe for a few nights or a week and if it continues then two weeks then a month etc he'll get it

    Answer by katiekruschke at 7:30 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • i wouldn't let him go out again for another month or maybe two. if he did it again that would be the last time until the next school year. i will not worry about you bc you cannot follow the simple rules i give you!

    Answer by angevil53 at 7:18 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • I'm very strict when it comes to this. If I say be home at a certain time then you do not just check in!! You be home.

    Answer by Cindy18 at 7:20 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • For me if they wouldn't be home on time they wouldn't be going again for a while. I am strict on that if I say a time they better be here on time or heads roll

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 7:22 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  •  Lectures are not effective and niether are direct punishments. But if for every 10 minutes late you counted earlier he misses a trip, thats fair. Dont tell him that is how you are counting, but if it is under 10 minutes he is clear. And make sure he understands it is his fault not yours by showing empathy for his situation but saying:

    "I know you really want to go but you didnt come home on time last Thursday when I let you go somewhere. I dont think I can trust you again yet. Maybe next time."


    Answer by amber710 at 12:15 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I would tell him simple, I give you a time to come home, it doesn't mean to check in. You need to be home right then & there. (How old is he?) You need to come home, or your not going out for a week.


    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 7:25 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • If I tell the kids they have to be home at a certain time, they have to be here (barring something out of their control). If they are late, they can't go anywhere for a week.

    Answer by Scuba at 7:48 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • I wouldn't give any. If I say something, you better do it. You can't get away with shit like that in the real world. If he called in to his work 10 minutes after his shift started he would get written up at the very least. He needs to know that he has to be held accountable for his actions. I would take away privledges & ground him.

    Answer by stressedmomma13 at 11:29 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • telling him to be home at 7 in my house means be home at 7 or very close to it
    if they call at 7 and say they are checking in I'd be telling them they need to be home and probably grounded for the next day or two if it happens a lot

    when I was a kid I was grounded for 1 day for every min. I was late when the street lights came on

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 7:59 PM on Aug. 22, 2010

  • My boys do get some lee-way because I trust them, they must call to check in when they get where they are going, and when they are on their way home.
    I typically do the bargaining before they leave, my son's are pretty good about asking before they leave the house. For example I say be home by 7:00 they say is 7:30 okay. I'll usually say yes unless we have something planned at that time and I expect them home, sometimes in the event they want to stay later they will call a half hour before the agreed upon time, in those cases I typically say no and tell them their friends can come to our house.
    I don't feel its something argue about but only because I trust them. If we don't get the phone calls and check in's then I either go pick them up or they don't get to go out next time.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 11:54 AM on Aug. 23, 2010