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is having sex once a month normal? adult content

My husband and I have been together for 5 years and r very yound, I'm 20 and he's 23. We have two kids under the age 2 & live with his parents to help them out. We berly have sex, it mostly once a week or month. I wAnt it all the time but he never does. He would touch me and play around and nothing will happen cause he said he's tired and has work tomorrow. It got so bad that I would do it while he slep. Is there something wrong with us? This has been a big problem and made us break... any help?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:15 AM on Aug. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • I think any amount of sex can be considered 'normal' in any relationship as long as both people are happy with the amount their getting. It sounds to me like you're not getting as much as you want though. Are you a SAHM while he works? This is my situation and I find that sometimes Dh just needs a little more work to get him to have sex when he's working a lot (last week he was working 12 hour shifts!). Are you actually trying to initiate sex?
    I have only one child under 2 and it's impossible sometimes to have sex. Right when we finally get enough time, she wakes up! I would just give him some patience and maybe just masturbate if you're not happy with the current amount of sex until the kids get a bit older.
    Also, I would talk to your Dh about it, and tell him you want more sex and initiate sex more.
    Mom2unangel

    Answer by Mom2unangel at 6:21 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • You guys are very young and have 2 young kids it might just be that he os over whelmed. I think any amount of sex can be normal. I only want it like 1 time a month but my dh works long hard, hot hours and wants it all the time to which he doesn't get it. I would try talking t him and if need be get counseling for yuo both and if he won't go go by yourself. Living with his oarents might not be the ideal situation either and maybe he doesn't feel comfortable having sex with his parents around. I know I wouldn't. See if maybe the 2 of you can have a date night and sex in the car or some place other then home.
    Moms_Angels1960

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 6:29 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • That's about the schedule for us. Both DH and I work a lot (I work FT, he works almost FT), he's a FT college student and I'm a PT college student plus we have two small children. So yeah we're very tired!!
    What's important is that you guys talk about it -- I'm sure your SO isn't trying to reject you or hurt your feelings, he probably really is tired. Can you guys make some time for just the two of you to reconnect?
    MommaofH2

    Answer by MommaofH2 at 6:33 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • Honestly speaking, I don't think there is a "normal" amount. However, it does sound like it is a problem if the amount is not satisfying to BOTH of you! I would try doing different things to get him in the mood. Get a nice nightie or lingerie. Ask him questions about sex, or talk dirty to him when you all are getting ready to go to bed. Play around together. If all else fails, just tell him you really need it more often than what he is giving it up! You may just be surprised at his reaction (in a good way, lol)>
    mommy11260

    Answer by mommy11260 at 6:37 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I have to agree if both partners are happy with it then it is normal for them. What's normal for one couple might be normal for another one. It wold be good if you could find out what he's feeling and as someone else mentioned it might be because you are living with his parents. You said u have 2 kids was he more intereted when u first got married? think about when things changed and try to remedy it.
    koolkidsmom

    Answer by koolkidsmom at 6:39 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I agree with Moms_Angels1960.
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 7:21 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • yes, but everyone does whats right for them as a couple
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 7:33 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • its normal for it a slow down over time, when I was first dating my DH we'd do it a few times a day! now with kids and a few yrs of marriage under us, we do it about once a month...sigh.. for us its more a lack of privacy and work schedules
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 7:34 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • With the fact that you have two children and your hubby works that doesn't make much since why you all have two children and you live with his parents and you all are lucky to have sex once a week or month.Have you spoke to your hubby about how this makes you feel.I would speak to him about it. Yes your hubby maybe tired from working and coming home and helping the kids but you should be just as tired if your home with the kids all day.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 7:44 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • honestly i wouldn't want to have sex in my parent's house either...... eventhough you two are married, i think the living situation and stress are the problems.
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 7:59 AM on Aug. 23, 2010

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