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What is a polite way to tell some one I am not interested in church and why?

My sister in law has invited me to church functions several times. I don't know her that well because her husband, my husband's half brother, doesn't associate with most of the family. I'm not ashamed that I do not believe the way that she does. I just don't and that is that. I'm pretty open-minded about religion and I don't push my beliefs on any one. I also don't let people push theirs on me. I wish she'd invite me to lunch instead of church functions so we could get to know each other. Maybe she would if I told her in a way she'll understand that I don't believe the way she does. I can't get to know her if I can't talk to her *which is what happened when I agreed to go to one dinner at her church.* If she decides she doesn't want to be around me because of that, it's her decision, but I'd at least like her to know where I stand. Any tips?


Asked by Mrs.B3 at 8:12 PM on Aug. 23, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 16 (3,196 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I would say I think it's really cool you are so involved in your church but to be honest I'm ______. (you never said) I know that there are a a lot/few differences and I really hope you don't mind because I sure don't! I would really like to get to know you better so would it be okay if we met for dinner instead?

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:16 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I don't go to church yet I have a better relationship with God than any of my church going friends. I just say I have my own beliefs and they do not include going to a building.

    Answer by Gene_Godwin at 8:22 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • Tell her that you are Agnostic.

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 8:18 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • Tell her the truth and invite her to lunch.


    Answer by beeky at 9:56 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I would just let her know that you're not interested in going.
    When someone asks me to go, I flat out let them know that I'm not interested in going.

    Answer by DesertRose75 at 8:16 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • You don't even have to say why. If it were me I wouln't even explain myself. I would hope that the person would respect me enough to understand what no thank you means.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 8:24 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I really like But_Mommie's answer.

    Answer by mpeada at 8:26 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • Tell her the truth and do not be afraid say hey as much as I enjoy your company we do not have the same beliefs. Tell her thanks for inviting me but I have my own beliefs.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 9:12 PM on Aug. 23, 2010

  • I try to be polite and end up having to resort to be stern and somewhat annoyed in mt response and sometimes that really doesn'
    t work either. Often I just have to walk away and ignore them

    Answer by Zoeyis at 5:28 AM on Aug. 24, 2010

  • You don't have to tell her anything actually. Just decline her invites to church and offer an alternative...a secular lunch, brunch, playdates if she has kids. When it comes to extended family, two things I refuse to discuss, politics and religion and it keeps the peace.

    Answer by isabellalecour at 10:35 AM on Aug. 24, 2010