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what do you do when you cant get along with your family

my mom died years ago. dad remarried a woman i cant stand. my dad isnt my bioglical dad. but he adopted me. he and my mom had two kids together. then mom died and he remarried she had threeboys. my kids and i felt like the token family. she didnt want my kids to call her grandma then she went through menopause then it was ok. they never spend time with my kids but do the other ones. the comments made are the worse my brother died she said he got what he deserved. my brother had alot of problems. ive never felt like we fitted in into their group. like a token . we have to invite them but we really dont want to. theres so much more. it would take a book to say everything. it seems like when my mom died i lost a connection. ive always been about family but i cant take them any more

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Asked by stressedoutgran at 10:45 AM on Aug. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Level 15 (2,324 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Then don't. If you have tried your hardest to involve them and talk about it to them, then you have made a serious effort. Concentrate on your life, your kids, whatever is going on in your life!! I bet you will be happier not always worrying about them. Good luck.

    Answer by Milaya2 at 10:49 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • i dont know. iv never been in a situation like that, i dont get along with my sister though. shes horrible. and so is her husband, i think she got way worse when she married him. anyway i am only around them when i have to be. like thanksgiving. or any of our kids birthdays.

    Answer by cassie_m at 10:49 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • You have to invite them to what? You don't have to do anything, but pay taxes and die.

    Answer by lovinangels at 10:50 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • I don't loose any sleep over it. I just do my thing and they do theirs and when they really want to do something they call. I have my own children to think about and raising them right, no need to have unwanted drama.

    Answer by Claudiomom at 10:55 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • I avoid my family like the plague. e don't get along what so ever and plus they are a bad influence to my kids. for you stepdads wife to say that is just wrong and I can't believe your stepdad didn't say anything to her. I would just avoid them all together. If he isn't making an effort to see you or make things work why even bother trying.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 11:00 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • I would look around for an older couple who maybe had never had children or whose children live far away, and I would adopt them. Those kind of people love to be included in family type events. We've done this when we couldn't be with our own families for special occasions or holidays, and it is a wonderful thing to do. You will be making someone else feel needed and as a result, you will feel happier than you ever imagined. A very wise person once told me that if you are the only one working on any kind of relationship, it is time to let it go. I think that's what you need to do. Let it go, and replace it with something far better.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:14 AM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • You have to do what is best for You and your children, NOT what is best for THEM. If they can't be nice and respect yours and your childrens feelings then honestly, I'd not have anything to do with them at all

    Answer by hapeewife at 7:03 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • I just cut them out of my life. My older sister and my Dad are cut out of my life. My middle sister and my mom are still in my life. I tell ppl if they can't treat me with respect and be nice there is the door. Just cuz your family does not mean they get to treat me like crap...and I choose who my "family" is...

    Answer by cattiesmom78 at 1:38 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

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