Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

I can't stand my 3.5 year old's behavior, please help me.

I'll start by saying I love him with all of my heart, he can be the sweetest, funniest, most affectionate little boy ever....but....he throws tantrums, he is demanding, impossible, cries and whines, fights with his 5YO sister several times a day. He does not listen to a word I say, I can call his name 10 times and he ignores me, it is only when I yell at the top of my lungs will it catch his attention, I don't want to do that. I don't know what to do with him anymore, its taking its toll on me. Any advice?


Asked by gramsmom at 2:13 PM on Aug. 25, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 22 (13,423 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • I agree with AshleyBDG. If you don't spank, use whatever method you discipline with (time outs, etc). Discipline the VERY FIRST TIME he does not respond/obey. Be very consistent (That is the hardest part). The first day you will feel like he has been punished all day long. However he will quickly learn to listen to you and respond the first time. You won't need to yell.

    Answer by micheledo at 2:49 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • My advice, may be bashed by others, but I have a happy very well behaved 3.5yr old who wasn't always this way, so I know it works. I don't yell - I do slip once in a while, but I try not to yell. At all. I started training him by asking him to do something, and if he didn't listen, I made him come to me and he got a swat on the butt (calm, still without yelling, and I told him why) then we went on with our day. From now on, discipline him the 1st time he ignores you. Every time. He'll start listening and he'll start obeying because he'll know your behavior won't change each time, that he's not getting a rise out of you- because you're calm- and he'll know the consequence of not obeying you. It takes a little while, but my son was so much better within 3 days of doing this. I got it from a book, and I'm thankful. He's actually happier, we're closer then before, he was craving consistency and they're happier when they get it. GL

    Answer by AshleyBDG at 2:21 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • also, I explained to him that he was not obeying and that was why he had to be disciplined, and it was not in anger, but out of love, and it was only on the butt, and I would tell him how many swats he was going to get -based on the offense, that shows them you're in control and not just hitting them or raging or anything else. They know what to expect and they know you're not angry but that you're consistent and in control of yourself and the situation.

    Answer by AshleyBDG at 2:24 PM on Aug. 25, 2010