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3 Bumps

Building a stronger marriage.

For those of you ladies who have been married awhile, what is your advice on making your marriage stronger. I think my husband and I have a good marriage, but I'm always looking for ways to strengthen it.

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MamaSarah1104

Asked by MamaSarah1104 at 3:54 PM on Aug. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,797 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • patience,acceptance,humor
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 3:55 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • My hubby and i started game nights where we send the kids to bed early and play some games like scrabble or dirty minds lol
    navajomama7

    Answer by navajomama7 at 3:56 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • My husband and I have been married for 5 years in October... he are EXTREMELY honest with each other and try not to hide anything at all from each other... and keep all of the people who have WAY TOO MUCH DRAMA out of your life as much as possible... every marriage has it's own level of drama and i don't know one that NEEDS any more especially from an outside source!!
    Jacky S.

    Answer by Jacky S. at 3:57 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • 17 yrs here and I think making a point to do things just us with out the kids is a big one. I dont want to wake up one day when the kids are out of the house and realize Im living with a stranger. We have both grown tremendously over the past 17 yrs and we have to work to keep our growth parallel. We dont have to have the same interests but we have to work at not growing apart.

    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 3:58 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Talk things over and really listen to how the other is feeling. Face problems together and figure out the best solution.

    Always discuss how family situations will be handled (like with siblings and parents) beforehand and then tell others your decisions. One of the hardest things I had to learn to say to my mom was, "I'll let you know after we have a chance to talk about it". Didn't take long for both she and I to get comfortable with it and it was the best approach.

    Accept each other's weaknesses........for better or worse, right?
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 3:59 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • We have date nights once a week. I always greet him at the door with a smile when he gets home from work - yes, it's old fashioned, but he appreciates it so much. We tell each other "I love you" several times a day, sometimes just a random text message to let the other one know that we're thinking about them. It's the little things.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 4:01 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Commiucation,honesty,being on the same page ALWAYS. My hubby and I have a very strong relationship we have the same beliefs in parenting and we also look at life the same, we also want nothing but the best from all of our children. Although we have only child together his other 2 children are just as important and a part of our whole family. We take 30 minutes a day on most days just to talk about whatever needs to be talked about. We have no secrets he knows everything and so do I. Our children are whole world so when it comes to having us time we try our hardest to make it happen sometime it's only a few hours but it's the time that we most often talk about the children.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 4:02 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • We've been married for 22 yrs. When we were 1st married I read an article in the Los Angeles Times about couples who'd been married 50 yrs. 1 husband said that especially when they were younger, his wife often "looked the other way" when he did things. I tried to take that to heart, now I don't mean things like cheating or abuse but things like inviting someone over to watch a game on tv when I hadn't slept all week & wasn't really ready for company. I'd try to let it go & make it fun for him. Not the best example, but I hope you get the idea.

    Also with your children, you love them unconditionally, & with our spouses there are times when we want to walk away, but we can "make a decision to love them" & there have been times when that was what I had to do.

    The other thing is, although your kids needs have to come 1st while they're young, your relationship with your spouse should be a priority. Don't forget to nurture it! GL
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 4:03 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Working on 46 years and still learning. It is very important that both men and women have some friends outside the marriage. Couples are wonderful, but women need women and men need men. I think it is more true of women, because we are the more emotional beings. If we don't have women friends, we tend to look to our husbands for every bit of our emotional support and most men simply are not equipped to give their wives that. Women can vent to women, and we understand each other. Try venting the same stuff to your husband, and he may look at you funny. The other thing I think is key is to keep your marriage the highest priority of all your relationships, and that includes the children. It is very easy to become so busy taking care of the children that we forget to nurture our husbands who really need that from their wives. He needs to feel that he is the most important person in your life at all times!!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:04 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • ~ Good, open, honest, safe communication about anything and everything.
    ~ Understanding and accepting that the two of you are not the same person, you will do things differently, view things differenty etc. Do not expect to always do things, or think alike in regards to things.
    ~ Work together not against one another, no matter the situation. You are a team, the ups and downs of life (much less the ups and downs in marriage) are much easier to deal with when you work together.
    ~ Do your best to show each other daily that you: love, respect, admire, adore, appreciate, desire, and want one another.
    ~ Have fun together, laugh together, and enjoy life together.
    ~ Great sex never hurts.. LOL
    ~ Keep your relationship a priority, do not allow life to put your relationship on the back burner.
    ~ Don't keep score or play tit for tat.

    Married 15 years now. Some of these things we learned the hard way.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 4:06 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

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