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3 Bumps

breastfeeding in public - explaining to the hubby that it's ok

i am not interested in a debate about whether or not you think people should breastfeed in public. i believe that it can and should be done and i will use a lightweight cover of some kind (recommendations welcome). however, this subject has come up recently a couple times when DH and i are registering and he is extremely opposed to it and making ludicrous suggestions about bringing bottles everywhere, going to the car (yeah, right... heat, space, REALLY??) and previously mentioned the bathroom (i don't even need to say why this is a problem). i told him he needs to open his mind and that he will feel different when his kid needs fed. he just said he's never liked it and he won't be around it. i think he's being a ridiculous ass but would appreciate suggestions on how to make this a more reasonable conversation.

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figaro8895

Asked by figaro8895 at 5:30 PM on Aug. 25, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 26 (27,251 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • Look at these  www.uttercovers.com

    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 5:33 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • udder covers. they are breathable and have an opening where you can see and get the perfect latch.

    i asked this same question yesterday. don't know how to post links but you can find it in search answers.
    keisha613

    Answer by keisha613 at 5:33 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • If he wants to eat while you are out after the baby make him go and sit in the car or hell even the bathroom. I don't understand why men feel that woman shouldn't be able to feed their children the way God intended in public. We are a nation that has our freedom and a mom has the freedom to decide to nurse her child in public if she so chooses. I wish you luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 5:33 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • tell him am going to bf in public you can either support me or not. but if you want me to bring bottles, you better be washing them and getting everything ready. its not his choice. is your boobs. he will get over it. or take the bottles and stuff but he has to carry it. he has to clean everything. how old is the baby?
    piwife

    Answer by piwife at 5:34 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Well it is a natural process that can be done discreetly and it provides your baby with the best. What else could he want for your little one. Does he plan on eating in the bathroom, that is disgusting and he should never expect his child to. Bottles are easy to fill with formula but can be very difficult to fill if you are unable to pump. I breastfed my little ones but could barely get a few drops when I was pumping and I was using a good pump from the hospital and it did not work. I hope that he comes around but if it were me I would not budge on the subject.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 5:36 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • First of all, way to go on deciding to breastfeed! I went thru the same thing with my DH. I never was able to convince him it was ok, but we always planned accordingly. I felt comfortable nursing the baby right before we left the house and we were never gone longer than a few hours anyway. It was also nice not having to uncomfortably whip out my boob in public. I can't think of any circumstance where it would have been a convenience to feed him in public. If I would've had to feed him my dh would've just had to deal with it. I hope things work out for you and good luck mama!
    1st_time_mom23

    Answer by 1st_time_mom23 at 5:37 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Personally I think that there is nothing wrong with compromise. If breastfeeding in public bothers him then its up to you to solve the conflict. I think feeding in the car is fine, I've done it (and you will want to too when it gets cold out) and even taking the baby to the bathroom is ok. All you have to do is put the paper cover over the toilet and have a seat. The baby stays on your lap and the door is closed. Most places even have a section for moms w/infants and if not then you can always use the handicap restoom. Honestly, I think you can do a bit more to make the situation more comfortable for the both of you. I always like to suggest a sling wide enough for feeding w/o breast exposure. They sell them at Wal-Mart. Good luck.

    sugahmamma

    Answer by sugahmamma at 5:46 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Simply put, my ex husband was my worst opposition. I did what I needed to for my child, if he wanted to behave badly that was his choice. I simply didn't relent to his protest (excepting for the one time that he literally RIPPED our child off of me, and I threatened to press charged because I almost lost a nipple)... As for covers, I do not believe in them. You draw MORE attention to yourself when using one, and are less discreet. Plus, I wouldn;t want to eat under a stuffy blanket, I wouldn't make my child.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 5:47 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • Well the first time we went out to dinner was on mother's day and my sister who is an expert in breast feeding came along with us. She sat next to my husband and I across. It squelched his nerves. It that is an option go for it. In my family I owned a bakery so I was very busy. I would sit with my back to the customers and wear a very large tee shirt drape the shirt around the babies head and get them to latch on. It was funny I was nursing a baby and talking to this customer ( a male) who came over to me. After a few minutes he looked me in the eye and said "oh my gosh your nursing the baby! I am so embarrassed".. I said why? He didn't want to innterrupt us. Turns out he didn't.
    So as for the discussion, I would just say this is how I choose to feed my baby and either your going to support me or your not. It really is not up for discussion. That is how I am so good luck. Stand tall and do what is right for you and your L.O
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 5:48 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

  • I would take him to the local Victoria's Secret and show him the ENORMOUS billboard of the half naked woman in her panties and bra and ask him what the CRAP is the difference.

    She is modeling a bra and you are feeding your baby. Much more skin is showing in that ad than you can show!!!!

    I HATE THIS DOUBLE STANDARD!!!!!
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 5:51 PM on Aug. 25, 2010

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