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How would you handle this?

My husband and I decided we wanted to have our children really close. We have been talking about it and last month we decided to stop the birth control and start trying. My period was supposed to be last week and I am going to do a pregnancy test this weekend. My Husband is in the army and if I am pregnant now he will be here until the baby is at least 5 months old. Today he tells me he does not want a second one yet, and when I tell him I might be pregnant now since we have been making an effort, he tells me "whatever" I started to cry thinking I am going to have a child that the father would not be 100% on, he then tells me if i want it so damn bad, that we will have another kid. I do not think I am comfortable having another child if the father is not all for it. What am I supposed to tell him? What would you choose to do?

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Asked by Laura_Cruz at 2:04 AM on Aug. 26, 2010 in Trying to Conceive

Level 10 (487 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I would probably just give it a few days before you talk about it again. Wait until you take the test. He probably has something else that is bothering him and it just came out the wrong way. Communication is the key in situations like this. Just ask him what is really bothering him and if you guys can talk about the Baby situation. I hope it all works out. Good Luck.

    Answer by hsmominky at 2:06 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • I wouldn't get all worked up yet until you know if you are pregnant or not. If not then stop trying until the two of you are both on board with it. If you are then consider counseling to deal with it and dh will probably come around. Talk to him. Ask him why he changed his mind so suddenly.

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 2:08 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • he said he would rather be able to do things before he leave for deployment like me and him getting drunk, which i dont want to do even if im not pregnant

    Comment by Laura_Cruz (original poster) at 2:13 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Well it sounds like that he is really immature and needs to concentrate more on things like his Family. I am sorry that you are going through this.

    Answer by hsmominky at 2:17 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • It sounds like got husband may have reconsidered. Maybe it'll bother him to much to leave a new baby. He's probably really worried about that. I say talk to him when you guys aren't upset and see where he stands.

    Answer by SultryLadyBug at 3:40 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • If your marriage is rocky you shouldn't get pregnant. It NEVER makes anything better. Instead it adds fuel to the fire. Never say never but I would definitely get whatever his feelings are sorted out first.

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 4:51 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Test to make sure you're not pregnant, then get back on birth control. Wait until after his deployment to try for another one. It doesn't sound like he's ready, regardless of prior conversations you've had with him.

    Answer by Scuba at 7:27 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • yes you should wait.u dont want to be popping kids when u dont know if that person goig to be there for u.100%i know you love him.but u know what trust in god and have faith.it will work out

    Answer by mwood108 at 10:49 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

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