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any ideas on getting my daughter to go to bed at night?

well my DD is 5 she starts kindergarten next week. i have always had issues with her going to bed. she says mom i cant sleep. she cries,she has even cried so hard she threw up bla, gets out of bed a few times. any ideas on what to do? we do read books before bed and do all th enight time stuff. thanks ladies

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Asked by gfam6 at 11:47 AM on Aug. 26, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 6 (144 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • well. Is she still hungry? Does she get up really early or really late? Is there something in her room that bothers her that she may not be telling you about?

    Answer by Mrs.Ro at 11:50 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • no i dont believe she is still hungry. she usually gets up about 9. no nothing in her room that she says and i have asked one time she said shadows but only once she said that. so im not sure

    Comment by gfam6 (original poster) at 11:54 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Bedtime "rituals" and reading at bedtime can actually cause problems. The child is getting attention and the worse they behave the more attention they get. I think it is better to have no rituals and to have bedtime to be when the child is sleepy if possible. As long as the child can get up in the morning then it may be better if they go to bed at 9 or even later with no problems then to try and force them to go to bed at 8. You can help sleep be easier for the child. No tv in the room. You can play the same or similar calming music.


    Answer by Gailll at 11:57 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Is she actually tired?

    I know a few people who can sleep in advance of need (usually because they learned to sleep to get away from the stress they were experiencing), but they're pretty rare. Mostly, people can only sleep when they are actually tired.

    The fact that your daughter will need to sleep earlier next weeks is... well, irrelevant, today. It's like the fact that she'll need to learn how to use pads and tampons when she's menstruating -does she need to start now to know how? Srsly.

    If you want her to swap around her hours, start by waking her up earlier each day --no more than 15 or 20 minutes is best for the shift to be gentle and tearless-- until she's waking when she needs to for school. Then, she'll gradually be getting tired earlier and earlier in the evening, too. When she's actually in school, the added stress of that will use even more of her energy so she'll need to sleep earlier... or nap afterwards.

    Answer by LindaClement at 11:58 AM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • more than likely she doesn't want to go to bed. You'll just have to keep putting her back in bed everytime she gets up. Once she figures out that no matter how crying, or throwing up will change your mind....she'll start staying. It can be a long, pain in the butt problem but if you stick to'll work out. If she does throw up, clean her up then put her back to bed and don't give in.

    Answer by how_reb at 12:00 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • When my little ones had troubles I created a strict routine: an hour before bedtime the lights would be turned off and we would use nightlights, we followed a routine, put a little soft music in their rooms and then I gave them light sticks to keep with them. Before long they would be asleep. I think it took like a good month, but then the kids were into it.

    I think if I were you, I would write down a routine, make some photos of stuff like the tub, toothbrushes, a few books, etc and make a poster WITH her. Follow the routine religiously, If you give a nighttime snack, give her stuff that will relax her like cheese, a piece of turkey, a glass of hot milk (if she dosen't like hot milk, try adding a bit of cinnamon sugar or pumpkin pie spice, add a little sweetner to make it more palatable (we call it "spiced milk". I buy for my kids light sticks (you can get them from target or party good stores). Sometimes that helps

    Answer by KiraSaucedo at 12:03 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • You could check out the super nanny website too. Her technique is to have the bedtime routine and then tell the child you will sit on the floor near the door. No is bedtime. Then sit there in the dark and wait. When she gets up you say nothing and put her back in bed. I have never did this, but have seen it on the show numerous times.

    We used to tell our youngest he had to stay in his room but could put his pillow near the door and lay there if he wanted. It gave him a view down the hall and he still felt "connected". It's what worked for him. We would move him to his bed later on. Good luck!!

    Answer by elizabr at 12:13 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • thanks everyone!

    Comment by gfam6 (original poster) at 12:40 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Start getting her up earlier everyday until you reach the time that she is supposed to be up. I would say about an hour before actual bedtime read to her then don't do it right before she goes to bed

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 8:25 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

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