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4 Bumps

If you have had an affair on your DH or SO before..

Did you feel guilty while it was going on? Or what was going through your mind? Did you have some sort of "reason" that you thought justified what you were doing? Or did you not feel bad at all about it? .. How long did it go on for, and do you regret it now?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:19 PM on Aug. 26, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • cont...its not something I'm proud of, but it is something that happened. I apologized for hurting him but not for what I did. He refused to bare any responsbility in the demise of our relationship for 5 years, when I was too co-dependent to leave because I was scared he would hurt too much (my brain was a muddled mess with confusion - on one hand I wanted out, in the other I didn't want him to be homeless and alone). I cheated multiple times, some were one night stands, others were longer relationships lasting up to 5 months.
    Through all this my husband still wants to stay married to me, he was there when these men left me and I cried myself to sleep, he was there when I moved out, he was there when I came home, he went to counseling when he knew couples counseling wasn't working...Do I feel bad - not really for my actions - but I do regret not knowing how to handle our relationship better before it got that bad.
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 5:23 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • never had one but i'll bump ya. i hope you get your answer
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:22 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • i never have with my new husband and never would. in the past my husband abandoned me and were not together yet still legally married. i didn't feel as bad as i should have cause of moral issues and now days i do feel bad about them only cause of them. it's not to hurt him but cause i hurt myself that i regret it. no self respecting person would just sleep around while married and had taken vows of for better or worse. glad i change my life and how i feel about myself.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 1:28 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Did you feel guilty while it was going on? It was only a one night stand so it wasn't on going. Or what was going through your mind? I was getting even with him for cheating on me. Did you have some sort of "reason" that you thought justified what you were doing?  Yup, my reason was to get even with him. If it was good for the goose, than it was good for the gander.Or did you not feel bad at all about it? I did feel bad. .. How long did it go on for, and do you regret it now?  I don't regret it now because it was years and years ago with my EX. I've never cheated on my current SO and never would.

    Cindy18

    Answer by Cindy18 at 1:46 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • I have with my babydaddy....


    Did you feel guilty while it was going on? No I was getting even for him putting hands on me


     Or what was going through your mind? "paybacks a bitch."


    Did you have some sort of "reason" that you thought justified what you were doing? revenge... and I really didn't care


     Or did you not feel bad at all about it? .. At first but not now, especially since I found womens underwear in my house that was a size 14.... I am a 7


     How long did it go on for, and do you regret it now? I don't know for how long lol

    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 2:21 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • Yes I have cheated on my husband, at the time I justified it in all kinds of weird ways and no I didn't feel guilty because I had my weird justification. At one point I couldn't even stop myself from seeing this person, it actually got so scary for me I remember calling a friend telling her I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I just couldn't stop and as strange as that sounds, finding out I had a mental illness after the fact helped it all finally make sense. I cheated because I had finally snapped after 20 years of being the only responsbile person in the household, working and supporting my family while he played with friends, cooking, cleaning, taking care of my boys, sex whenever he wanted...list goes on...I was tired and I wanted out but was too scared to leave because of the children. It started innocent and then escalated...there was more than 1 affair in 2 years - there were many. ...
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 5:20 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

  • I have never had an affair and I never will. Good luck
    noahsmommy12908

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 5:25 PM on Aug. 26, 2010

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