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How do I MAKE myself like being a mother of two. (2.5+6=still hate having 2 kids)

I HATE that I chose to have two kids. I was an only child and didn't want my child to be one so I had another. I really wish I hadn't. They bicker and feed off of each other. If one is in a foul mood then the other is two. If one is happy and excited they get themselves more and more worked up. My older one does nothing but scream at the younger. She is constantly intentionally making him scream. I am constantly separating and correcting them for it. I can't take them together anywhere because the older one tells the younger one to do things he know will get her in trouble or she will get in trouble for something then he mimics it but he knows better. I can't stand being with them together. I HATE HATE HATE it. I love them one on one. I enjoy being with one or the other not together. Together I want to hide and not come out of my room. If DH is home he deals with them so I don't have to. When they are both con't

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Aug. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Can i ask you a question?
    What were your expectations of having 2 children?

    My dad was an only child and always wanted siblings. So he really wanted more than one kid, but he was unprepared for the reality of it. All through our childhood he needed to be reminded by my mom that sometimes, siblings act this way. His expectations of having more than one child did not live up to what reality was.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 5:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • You can change how you look at the situation. Instead of hating that you had a second child you can learn how to be an effective parent. This may take reading, classes, conferences, counseling, college courses, and other efforts. You can learn and you can have a happy family. A good place to start would be the books How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Siblilngs Without Rivlery.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 5:26 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • well, school starts soon, right? maybe absence will make the heart grow fonder and they'll fight less?
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 5:20 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • home I can't stand even the sounds of their voices. Ds is back in school now and I love having DD all to myself. I dread DS getting off the school bus. I know it will be harder because DS has aspergers and is easily frustrated by his sister and DD is extremely bright so she already knows exactly what to do to get him in trouble or set him off. I regret having two kids so bad but I wouldn't trade either of them for the world. How do I make myself like having 2?
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:23 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • do you feel like this often?
    or just having on eof those days
    we all have those days
    but
    if you think your days are more often than other moms
    i would seek some parenting advice/counseling

    gl
    God Bless you
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 5:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • I knew they would bicker some so I tried to set up rules to help keep it down but it didn't work
    Like giving them separate baths so they have one on one time with me or Dad every day. Room time every night before bed they play for 30 min in there room by themselves. They have their own rooms and own toys but the rule is if they come out of you room they are to share. SO if they bring toys down stairs they have to share them or take them back up. WE are working with DS to get him to understand that he 2 year old sister has no say over what he does. ((sigh)) If she says don't go in the kitchen he will bust out crying that his sister won't let him in the kitchen! If starts screaming so does she so when he ahs a melt-down (less often that it used to be) it a double whammy. I seriously don't even take them to dinner together and even DH agrees with that and he had 2 brothers.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:34 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • I think they need something special to share together, perhaps. Like a karate or swimming class..... on you need to see if you can afford to rent a high school kid say 2 or 3 days a week to get your son off the bus.... try and get them doing things together more. can he push the little one in wagon/stroller? goto park and push her on the swings? can they take an art class together or something?
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 6:47 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

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