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4 Bumps

My SO told me that he realizes that he is a fault for most of our problems

He resents me going to in a small apt with my mother and 2 daughters. We have been trying to move out of her for over 6 yrs. I went bcd to school 7 yrs ago so that i can increase our income because I was in a stable but dead end job. Throughout this time he has progressed in his career. He never have good financial understanding. For him his job and hard work is most important since he is the sole provider. I put in but don't make much we recently just go over a fight because of MIL and he sided w/her. It went on for 1 month I got so fed up I tried to kick him out and then he broke down and said he was sorry he knows i don't deserve this that he has problems but at the same time he tired of fights that escalate into both trying to top one another. He wants to go to therapy and he have been intimate but I still feel him distant. I feel he should just leave he comes home late and says he is confused & needs help.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:24 PM on Aug. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • bump

    Answer by victoriamom2007 at 10:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • He sounds like a man with a very guilty conscience. Has he done something worse that you didn't mention?

    I would say that if you stay together, he needs to follow through with his desire for therapy, immediately. Like he better have a therapist next week, type of thing. And if not, he needs to go.

    Good luck mama, I hope it all works out for the best.

    Answer by kathria at 10:28 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • is there a question to this? everyone has problems just work them out or leave. chances are though that you will have problems with the next guy as i said everyone has problems.

    Answer by melody77 at 10:30 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • If you have been living in a small apartment with your mother for 7 years and things haven't gotten better it seems like there has been poor planning. That is a long time to be stuck in a bad situation.  


    Answer by Gailll at 10:36 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • yeah he doesn't want to leave and yes it has been poor planning. Because we cant seem to come to a financial understanding. After all these yrs he wants counseling but I feel like he has made his decision already. He tells me that I'm trying to force him to give me an answer but he cant give me one because he has to work with himself first. But I don't think that is fair to me either, I'm on anti-depressants right now because i have been crying and not sleeping for a month. We're going to therapy TUE but it has been going on for so long i feel like may be i'm being to pushy. I love him dearly but he has hurt me so bad he says he wants the therapist to say if a separation is a good idea. But i also see him apprehensive about leaving which makes me want to work it out but honestly I need to maintain my dignity we have been together for 12 yrs

    Answer by jenlesly at 10:44 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • Well, it is what it is as the say. Maybe yall can try to start fresh, apologize for things becoming out of hand if that's how one of you feels, if not both- but where do you want to go form here. Whatare your goals in life and where do you want to be in a year or five? ten?

    Answer by txdaniella at 10:55 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • It sounds like he is depressed with the situation. You didn't mention whose house it is. Do you really want to be with your MIL by yourself in the house? I wouldn't be. It's his mother, let him deal with it.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 10:57 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

  • I hope you can start out fresh also. Good luck

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 11:42 PM on Aug. 27, 2010

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