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why ?

my stbx is great with his family, our daughter, his friends . but when it comes to me, he treats me like i am a piece of trash and is disgusted with me. he is the one who left me for another woman. i don't think i deserve to be treated like this. i have been hurt enough, and for him to keep it going is just plain mean.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on Oct. 10, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • I'm sorry for your pain and ur obviously a smart women b/c ur not making excuses for him or his behavior. There really is no way to change him and u know that - but he is treating you badly b/c he can. For whatever reason, he has been taught that speaking down to you and being just plain rude to you is acceptable. You have to teach him that this is no longer true. And btw he is not being a great dad if he is being a jerk to his daughters mommy. Believe me ur dd picks up on what he is doing and saying, no matter how old she is and she may even start to mimic him. My advise? When he begins to berateu or to talk down to you - do the exact opposit of usual. If u usually say nothing - confront him. If u usually walk away - stand ur ground. Tell him thathe is not ur problem anymore and u will not be treated like this ever again. And see what happens Good luck
    mommyof5boys543

    Answer by mommyof5boys543 at 10:49 AM on Oct. 10, 2008

  • maybe he does it cause he is miserable without you!
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 11:56 AM on Oct. 10, 2008

  • Men who do that are having some sort of power play going on. It's a form of abuse. It's a sort of manipulation to put you in "your place" and make you feel like you are not worthy of happiness or worthy of being treated well. If you fall for his crap then you are allowing him to have power over you. Don't sweat it. It's HIS issue not your's. Just smile and tell him to get on with his life and that your's is going to be much better without him. (and it will)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:03 PM on Oct. 10, 2008

  • I am with admckenzie and mommyof5. This is a form of abuse. You are the person he can push around to make himself feel more powerful. Don't be his punching bag. You seem like a nice person, you deserve better. When he treats you like that, tell him "whatever" and then don't communicate with him. If you don't give him that power, he won't have it. What an asshole.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 12:57 PM on Oct. 10, 2008

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