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Pee shy 8 yr old?

She started school 2 weeks ago and she has already wet her pants 3 times. Last year and the year before in K it was a once or twice a week thing. It didn't seem that bad for a K or 1st grader but 2nd? i took her to the doctor an Friday and they said nothing was wrong. I talked to her about it and she doesn't like to ask. I asked her why and she said she didn't know. They have a set bathroom break two times a day since she has been in school but she said she doesn't want anyone to hear her pee. I don't know what to do about this. I asked her isn't it worse to pee in your pants than to just ask to go? She refused to answer and I dropped the subject. I don't know how to help her. Once I got to thinking about it I can't even tell you the last time she asked me about going to the bathroom even on car trips. Clearly this is a problem. Can the school accommodate and let her use the teachers single stall bathroom to pee?


Asked by Anonymous at 8:38 AM on Aug. 28, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • OH MY! I am so sorry!!! But this definitely sounds to me like a psychological issue, not a medical issue. I would schedule a time she can talk to someone...a lady psychologist. And I would do this ASAP!!!! Oh this brakes my heart! Please let us know what happens!!!

    Answer by MartaJoy at 9:26 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • Has she been bullied or anything at school to make her not want to use ti there? Is she like that out places as well or just at school?

    Answer by fourisplenty at 8:59 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

  • My daughter has voiding (going pee) issues. We are seeing a pediatric urologist. I suggest you do the same. I know you have taken her to the doctor and I assume that it's been her normal pediatrician or the family doctor. Sometimes you just need to trump them and go see a specialist. There are pediatric urologist out there, they would be able to help you more and would be more knowledgeable on what is "normal" and "not normal" when it comes to things of this nature.

    Answer by SAHMinIL2 at 10:21 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

  • IDK but I doubt they will let her use the teacher's toilet. It's worth asking though. Could there be some reward for her that you give her at home if she uses the toilet in school? I read on here that kids sometimes have fears too like one little girl saw a spider in the toilet and was frightened. Just throwing out ideas.............I hope everything works out OK hug

    Answer by elizabr at 10:34 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

  • Nothing has happens that she has told me about. I have figured out now she has only peed at school a few times when she was alone in there. She was the class messenger last year so she got to carry notes and such, I think she would stop and pee then if it was empty. Her teacher this year was upset because she never asked or anything she just would be sitting ther and then start peeing in the chair. never even flinched. She said she would be sitting listening than then wet with tears in her eyes. If she wasn't bullied before... I dom't know if she has been teased or not since then. I mean is there something wrong with erh mentally? The doctor chesked her urine which was a night mare. getting her to pee in a cup. I mean we almost had to cathiterize her to get it.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:44 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

  • Is there a school psychologist on staff or anyone you know who might shed some light on this? Sometimes kids get "stuck" in an emotional place and it is hard to find the one thing that will help them.

    Answer by elizabr at 11:36 AM on Aug. 28, 2010

  • I talked to the school and they have agreed to send he to the bathroom during 'class times' so she can *hopefully* go to an empty restroom. In the mean time I have continued to talk to her about the matter. WE even talked about a 'code word' to tell the teacher she needed to go. Like 'can I go get a drink of water?' She seemd ify about that idea so I told her I could talk to the teacher when she wasn't there and she said okay. I have a meeting with her tomorrow afternoon. As far as a psychologist goes... I had considered that to. I read about kids who can be pee shy and some are even selectively mute because of shyness!! She isn't a very social child anyway. She has a few friends and isn't big on group events never has been. I don't know, it seems to be her personality.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:44 PM on Aug. 31, 2010